Eat, play, sleep schedule

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This schedule is popular because it’s fairly flexible. You can adjust what happens between the “play” and “sleep” parts of the schedule. You can put your baby to bed wide awake, or you can do a little rocking/soothing to get your baby drowsy before sleep. The beauty of this schedule is that it ensures your baby is awake after feedings; what happens before the next nap (and how awake your baby is going into their bed) is up to you.

Eat Play Sleep Schedule: What Is It?

This is pretty simple: with an eat play sleep schedule, your baby eats (at the breast or the bottle), then plays for a bit (has some tummy time, listens to a book, enjoys a lullaby, etc.), this also helps digestion and trapped air, and then goes down for a nap.

The particulars of this particular sleep and feeding schedule depend largely on unique factors. The length of the feeding, the length and type of play, the timing of the nap (and the length of the nap) all depend on your baby’s age and temperament. But the basic layout is the same: it’s always eating, followed by some playing, and then finally a nap.

Note that I keep saying “nap” here; that’s because this is a schedule designed to be used during the daytime. Your bedtime routine should be different (although you would still, ideally, end the bedtime routine with your child awake and falling asleep without the help of sleep associations). In addition, you would skip the ‘play’ part after any night feedings, and simply put your child straight to bed after night feeds. If you’re sleep training, you’d want to put your child back to bed at least slightly awake after night feeds.

Eat Play Sleep Schedule: Why it can sometimes fail and When to avoid It

The eat play sleep schedule isn’t all good all the time, however; there are situations in which this kind of schedule isn’t ideal. Times to avoid (or at least to modify) an eat play sleep schedule include….

….during illness. A sick child needs comfort and soothing, and when your child is ill, it’s perfectly fine to suspend your usual schedule in favour of soothing your child to sleep.

….during times of travel or change. If you are in the midst of a big life transition (like moving to a new house, or having a new baby, then you’ll need to cut your child some slack and be ready to offer more soothing and sleep help than usual. In addition, if you are vacationing, and your child is in a new and unfamiliar sleep environment, eat play sleep may not work as well as it does at home.

….during growth spurts. During a growth spurt (especially a newborn growth spurt), your child will feed for what feels like forever! In the midst of all these feedings, it may not be practical to do an eat play sleep schedule every time your child wakes to eat.

What Age Can You Put Your Baby on a Schedule?

You can put your baby on a sleep schedule almost from birth but it’s important not to be too strict until your baby is at least 6 months old. Newborns need to eat and sleep on demand to support a rapid period of growth and development. Once your baby can tolerate staying awake for 2-3 hours at a time, a more consistent schedule can be used.

Even if your baby is young, you can put your baby on a schedule largely based on their “nap gap.” This is the amount of time between sleep periods, including the time between naps and between their last nap and bedtime.

Baby Schedules

Babies 4 to 10 months old need an average of 14 hours of sleep a day with 11-12 hours at night and 2-3 hours during the day. Many babies’ night-wean in this age range but it varies depending on whether you’re breastfeeding or formula-feeding. Each schedule below will discuss what to expect for babies at that age.

4 Month Old Baby’s Sleep and Development

Pediatricians disagree high and low about when a baby is capable of sleeping through the night and only a handful of parents who reach this page will have a 4 month old who sleeps all night without even a single feeding (those that do are LUCKY!).

Most 4-month-olds need 11-12 hours at night and 3-4 hours during the day. And, many 4-month-olds are still eating 1-2 times a night and some naps are just 30 minutes. In addition, most 4 month olds will take 4 naps a day. Consequently, short naps are normal development at this age as it’s highly unusual for babies to take four 1-hour naps.

How Many Naps for a 4 Month Old?

Most 4 month old babies take 4 naps each day totaling 3-4 hours of sleep. The reason for so many naps is primarily because babies this age can’t stay awake longer than 1-2 hours at a time. They still have short wake windows so it’s still common to spread out daytime sleep among multiple sleep periods. However, some babies this age can stay awake longer and drop the fourth nap transitioning to a 3-nap schedule early.

5 Month Old Baby Sleep and Feeding Schedules

5 month old babies typically have 2-3-hour wake windows throughout the day between naps and before bedtime. If your baby struggles to stay awake longer than two hours at a time, that’s NOT unusual at this age. Not all babies can stay awake 2 1/2 to 3 hours just yet at this age.

Also, at this age, baby bedtimes are typically between 6:00 and 8:00 PM unless you have a baby who likes to sleep late in the morning.

How Many Naps for a 5 Month Old?

Your 5-month-old is most likely taking 3 to 4 naps per day for a total of 3 to 4 hours of sleep per day plus 10-12 hours at night. The number of naps your baby takes at this age most often depends on how long they can stay awake between sleep periods. The shorter they can stay awake, typically, the shorter the naps. A 2 to 2 1/2-hour wake window is common and that typically leads to a 3-nap schedule. There are a few babies this age who take two 2-hour naps and sleep 10-11 hours at night. If your baby does this, that’s just fine!

Most 5 month old babies take 2-3 naps each day that total 2 to 3 1/2 hours. Babies this age stay awake and have wake windows between 2 and 3 hours at a time, on average.

Wake Windows for 5 Month Olds

The typical wake windows for a 5-month-old are approximately 2 hours with the first wake window being one of the shortest. Sometimes, that first wake window is just 90 minutes. There is a small percentage of 5-month-olds that can stay awake 2-3 hours at a time but 2 hours is average.

5 Month Old Feeding

5 month old babies typically eat every 3 to 4 hours during the day. Please be aware that breast milk and/or formula should be your baby’s primary nutrition for the first year and solids come secondary.

Below are the average amounts per day.

Average amounts per day:

  • At least 5-6 breastfeeding sessions per day (4-6 during daylight hours, and 1-3 at night) or 700 to 800mls of formula or combination (decrease solids if your baby is not taking in at least this much)
  • Water is unnecessary (breast milk and formula have plenty of water in them).

Sample 5 month old schedule

Obviously, all babies vary, but here are sample schedules you can use to make your own for your unique baby. Schedules are hit-and-miss at this age because many babies simply cannot stay up past 2 hours to get to the next scheduled nap time. Therefore, at this age, it’s likely naps are still on the short side but come frequently. Over the next several weeks, you can work on getting down to just 3 naps to get closer to the 6 month schedule.

5 Month Old Schedule with Short Wake Windows

This schedule works best for babies who become overtired quickly and can stay awake for about 1.5 – 2 hours between naps:

5 Month Old 4-Nap Sleep Schedule With Feedings
TimeActivity
6:30 AMWake and feed
7:15 AMplay
8:00 AMMorning Nap (at least 1 hour)
9:00 AMFeed (upon waking; no need to wake baby up!)
11:00 AMLate Morning Nap (often 45-60 minutes)
12:00 PMFeed (upon waking)
2:00 PMEarly Afternoon Nap (often 30-45 minutes)
3:00 PMFeed
4:30 PMCatnap (~30-45 minutes; can be “on the go”)
5:30 PMSnack Feed (if necessary)
6:00 PMStart Your Bedtime Routine
6:15 PMFeed
6:30 PMBedtime (goal to be asleep by this time)
#The baby sleep site

New Dads

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Life as a new dad

Becoming a dad will probably be one of the biggest events of your life.

Making the most of any time you have off work to get to know your baby is a great way to start your life as a dad. You might also be tempted to get a few things done around the house. In the longer term, though, there’s a bigger pay-off for using this time to begin your relationship with your child.

But if you’re going through the intense emotions – not to mention lack of sleep – that often come with a new baby, you might be wondering where to start and what to do. You might even be thinking your partner has it all covered, and feeling unsure of what’s left for you to do.

In fact, as a dad, you’re going to have a huge impact on your child’s life. And that impact starts now. Newborn babies come into the world ready to connect with both their parents.

New dads: tips for getting started

1. Get hands on from the beginning
Getting involved in the daily care of your baby – dressingsettlingplayingbathing and nappy changing – is the best way to build your skills and confidence. These everyday activities also create lots of one-on-one time with your baby, which is the building block of a positive relationship. Another bonus is that it’s also good for your baby’s other parent to have a break.

2. Learn your baby’s cues
Babies give ‘cues’ or signals to what they need through their behaviour and body language. By really paying attention to your baby’s cues, over time you’ll learn how to work out what your baby needs.

3. Connect through touch
Physical touch makes your baby feel safe and secure and builds trust and connection with you. This kind of bonding with newborns also stimulates your baby’s brain development. You could try carrying and holding your baby as often as you can. If you hold her to your chest, she can hear your heartbeat.

4. Talk to your baby as often as you can
Talk while you’re carrying or changing your baby. For example, ‘Let’s get this nappy changed. That feels better, doesn’t it? Here’s a nice clean nappy. Don’t cry – we’ll be finished soon’. Every word baby hears helps develop his language and learning and strengthens your relationship with him. Telling stories, reading books or singing songs has the same effect.

5. Help with breastfeeding
Breastmilk is the best food for your baby. Your support for breastfeeding can be vital while your partner is learning. You could give practical support – a glass of water, another pillow or whatever she needs. Or if she’s having trouble, you could encourage her to get help. If your partner finds she can’t breastfeed, you could reassure her that it’s OK and consider learning about bottle-feeding and formula.

6. Have some one-on-one time
This kind of time is about you and your baby. If you can create moments when your baby has your full attention, you can really tune in to your baby. This gives the two of you a chance to connect and bond. For example, it can be as simple as making faces at each other while you dress your baby.

7. Get the information that you need
Whether it’s your first or fifth baby, there are always new things to learn. You can find information by searching this website, talking with other dads and attending parenting groups, for example. And one of the best ways to learn is by doing – spending lots of time caring for your baby.

8. Accept or ask for help
If someone says, ‘Is there anything I can do?’, it’s OK to say ‘Yes!’ Talk with your partner about when you’ll accept help from family, friends, colleagues or neighbours. It might be as simple as asking someone to buy some milk for you when they come over to visit.

9. Look after your relationship
Having a new baby can put extra strain on your relationship with your partner. Try to stay positive and support each other as you learn how to parent together. Asking how your partner is going lets your partner know you care. Negotiating and sharing expectations is good practice for later parenting. This can be about everything from deciding on paid work arrangements to who cooks dinner.

10. Look after yourself
If you’re well, you’ll be better able to look after your baby and support your partner. You can keep your energy up with healthy lifestyle choices and as much sleep and rest as you can – even if it’s not at night.

Is your babies bedtime too late?

Nurturing the Nurturer postpartum doula insights

A lot of the sleep issues I come across are products of a bedtime that is too late.  The awake time between the last nap of the day and bedtime is the most sensitive.  What I mean by this is that if we are putting baby down too late, stretching baby out too long, it is a recipe for nightwakings, a restless sleep and an early morning wake-up.  Therefore, it is vital that we are really ‘nailing’ bedtime and that we aren’t keeping baby up too late.  What time would you put an 8 year old to bed?  Likely not at 10:00pm, right?  Then why should a little baby, only months old, have a bedtime that late?  It should be the exact opposite – babies should be going to bed much earlier than older children as their sleep needs are exponentially more than a school-aged child

So how do I know when I should put my baby to bed for the night? As I mentioned in the first paragraph, it is of utmost importance that the stretch from the last nap to bedtime is not too long as this will cause fragmented night sleep.  Below, I will outline how long that last stretch should be, and as well, how many naps on average that babies need at each age.  Keep in mind as well, that if the last nap was very short, you may need to shorten the awake time even more.

0-2 months: babies this age sleep around the clock and have 4 or more naps every day.  Bedtime in newborns is naturally late, usually around 9:00pm or later, but it is important to start moving the bedtime earlier around 6/8 weeks.  By 2 months, baby’s last nap should be ending by 6:30pm. Bedtime should be around 6:30-8:30pm and should occur about 1-2 hours after the last nap ends.

3 months: babies this age should be on a solid 4 nap schedule with the last nap of the day ending by 5:30pm.  Bedtime should be no later than 1.5-1.75 hours after the last nap ends.  Remember, this is asleep by time so we want to put baby down 15 minutes prior to this to allow him time to fall asleep.  So, this means that bedtime should not be much later than 7:15pm.

4 months: This is the age where babies will transition from 4 naps to 3 naps.  This might mean that your baby will flip-flop back and forth between 4 naps and 3 naps depending on what time she woke up in the morning, and the quality of the day’s naps.  If it is a 3 nap day, it is likely you will be needing an early bedtime.  Do not be afraid of an early bedtime during nap transitions – it will be your saving grace!  At 4 months, all naps should be ending by 5:00pm with bedtime happening about 2-2.25 hours after the last nap ends.  So again, this means that bedtime should not be much later than 7:15pm.

5 months: Babies at this age should be solidly on a 3 nap schedule.  All naps should be ending by 5:00pm and bedtime should occur no later than 2-2.5 hours after the last nap ends.  This means that bedtime will be around 7:00-7:30pm which is a very age-appropriate bedtime considering you just lost one entire sleep period when you transitioned from 4 naps to 3, and babies this age still need 11-12 hours of night sleep with up to 2 night feedings.

6/7 months: Babies still need 3 naps at this age and most stay on a 3 nap schedule until 8/9 months of age.  Naps should be ending by 5:00pm with bedtime happening 2.25-2.75 hours after the last nap ends.  So a bedtime of no later than 7:45pm is age-appropriate.

8/9 months: This is the age where most babies will drop their 3rd nap and move to a 2 nap schedule.  This nap transition also means that we want to use a super early bedtime on the days where we can’t fit in a 3rd nap or baby refuses it entirely.  Do not be afraid of putting your child down to bed as early as 4:45pm.  This does not mean that baby will be up at 4:00 in the morning!  Remember, less day sleep = more night sleep.  You have just lost an entire sleep period so baby will need to make up for this loss of sleep during the night.  Our goal with babies younger than 9 months of age is to protect night sleep at all costs.  There is no advantage to a late catnap and thus a later bedtime if baby is up every 3-4 hours at night crying.  All naps should be ending by 4:00pm with bedtime occurring 3-3.75 hours after the last nap ends.  This means a bedtime no later than 7:30/7:45pm.

10-18 months: This section is for babies within this age range but still on 2 naps.  Most babies keep 2 naps until 13-18 months, with the average being 15 months.  Do not be too quick to drop that second nap as the longer we can hold off this transition, the smoother it will be.  Again, all naps should be ending by 4:00pm with bedtime happening between 3-4 hours after the last nap ends.  Note: we would want to use the lower end of that range for younger babies closer to 10-12 months.  As well, as we approach the 2-1 nap transition the afternoon nap may shrink and become less restful.  This means that you will want to shorten the time between this nap and bedtime as well to keep baby well-rested.  Bedtime should be no later than 7:00-8:00pm.  If you are finding that baby starts to wake frequently at night or earlier in the morning than usual, try scaling back bedtime even more, possibly to even 2.5-3 hours after the last nap ends.  This is a normal pattern as we get closer to dropping the second nap. It can seem daunting to move your child’s bedtime earlier when previously they were going to sleep much later but it is very important in order to ensure good quality, healthy, and restorative night sleep.  Make sure that if you are working to move the bedtime earlier, that you have a consistent and soothing bedtime routine in place to signal to the child that this is in fact bedtime and not another nap.  At the beginning, you may want to do a bath every single night as this is often a surefire cue to babies that bedtime is impending. A lot of parents may worry that their spouse will never see the baby if bedtime is so early but if baby was previously sleeping in because of the late bedtime, then the other parent may get an opportunity to see baby in the morning once baby’s wake-up time moves earlier and to a more ‘natural’ time.  Unfortunately, babies very rarely fit into our schedules as their sleep needs are just so high, but there is not much for a baby that is more important than healthy sleep (well, food maybe!) 

Pam Edwards is a Certified Infant & Child Sleep Consultant and founder of Wee Bee Dreaming Paediatric Sleep Consulting, now based out of Kamloops,

Swaddling

Nurturing the Nurturer postpartum doula insights

What Is Swaddling?

Swaddling simply means tightly wrapping up baby in a wrap in such a way that makes them feel secure, like being back in their Mum’s belly, all warm and comfy. You can swaddle baby from day 1, for naps and nighttime sleep; it helps keep them feeling compact and cosy and may even deter the jolting startle reflex.

Why Swaddle Baby?

Swaddling creates the snug, familiar, soothing feeling a baby experienced in the womb before being born. It makes baby feel safe, because in the last few months before birth, baby didn’t have much space in the womb and could only make small movements.

Babies can be swaddled anytime they are fussy or seemingly crying for no reason (no dirty nappy and you know they’re not hungry because you just fed them, etc.). Being swaddled is like receiving a big hug, that snug, swaddled feeling can help keep baby calm, especially when combined with other baby-soothing techniques, such as swaying and making a loud ‘shh’ sound. When done correctly swaddling can also help baby fall asleep faster and stay asleep longer.

Mothers have been swaddling their babies for thousands of years. Whether you’re a new parent or a veteran, you could probably use the extra sleep that swaddling your baby will provide.

Unfortunately, swaddling your baby might seem like somewhat of an art form. Wrap this, tuck that. It can feel confusing, especially when you’re up for a 3 a.m. feeding. Learning and practicing the art of swaddling your baby will help you get more sleep. It will also help your baby feel more secure and comforted, just like they were in the womb.

You might be thinking that swaddling your baby every time they go to sleep (which is a lot) seems like a lot of work, but there are many benefits to swaddling your baby. Here are some you and your baby will experience:

Swaddling protects your baby against their natural startle reflex, which means better sleep for both of you

It may help calm a colicky baby

It helps eliminate anxiety in your baby by imitating your touch, which helps your baby learn to self-sooth

It keeps their hands off their face and helps prevent scratching

It helps your baby sleep longer and better

It helps prevent SIDS by keeping unnecessary items like pillows, blankets, and stuffed animals out of your baby’s cradle

It keeps your baby on their back while they sleep

How to swaddle your baby

If you’ve never swaddled a baby, it might seem like a complicated process. But it doesn’t have to be. Practice the following steps a few times and you’ll be a pro.

Spread out your swaddling blanket on a soft, flat surface. Arrange the blanket in a diamond shape with the bottom of the diamond pointing toward you.

Fold down the top edge of the blanket. This should create a loose triangle shape. Set your baby with his feet pointing toward you. His shoulder should be just below the fold in the blanket.

Arrange your baby’s right arm next their body with their arm slightly bent. Pull that same side of the blanket up and over your baby’s right arm and body, then tuck it underneath your baby. Your baby’s left arm should be left free.

Fold the bottom of the swaddle blanket up over your baby’s feet. If the blanket is long enough, tuck it behind their shoulder.

Complete the swaddle by pulling the remaining side of the swaddle up and over your baby’s remaining arm and across their body.

Learning how to swaddle a newborn is a skill that takes practice. With a little patience (and the right blanket!), you’ll get the hang of it. Just be sure to use safe swaddling techniques, and you’ll be a wrapping baby like a pro in no time.

Safety tips

Although swaddling comes with numerous benefits, you need to make sure you’re doing it right to avoid danger or discomfort for your baby. Follow these safety tips:

Don’t wrap too tight. Swaddling your baby tight enough that they can’t move their hips or legs may limit the development of the hip. Aim for a tight enough swaddle that will hold your baby’s arms firm, without completely immobilizing their entire body.

Always lay your baby down on their back after swaddling.

Stop swaddling your baby as soon as they can roll over.

Don’t double up on blankets when you swaddle. The extra thickness could cause your baby to overheat. It can also dislodge easier, which adds to the risk of suffocation.

Swaddling your baby is a great way to get them to sleep better. When your baby sleeps better, so do you. Once you learn how to swaddle a baby, you’ll know how to do it in your sleep (literally)!

Is Swaddling Safe?

Some parents might wonder: Can swaddling cause Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS)? The answer is: Not directly. According to the American Academy of Paediatrics, swaddling allows baby to sleep more soundly (which is why parents swaddle in the first place); but decreased arousal has been linked to an increased risk of SIDS. A 2016 Paediatrics journal study reports that the recommendation to avoid having baby sleep on their side or stomach is especially important when babies are in a swaddle. So if you’re swaddling, make sure baby is on their back, and when they’re old enough to roll in their sleep, it’s best to stop swaddling altogether.

 Still, swaddling may sound a bit counterintuitive. Paediatricians advise against giving a baby under 12 months a loose blanket or having any plush materials in their cot. This is among the reasons it’s essential to practice safe swaddling techniques.

What If My Baby Doesn’t Like to Be Swaddled?

Keep in mind that most babies resist swaddling—or so parents think, that’s because when babies were in the womb, their resting position was with their arms up by their faces—so when a parent tries to bring their arms down by their sides, they may resist. But this doesn’t mean a baby doesn’t like to be swaddled.

Even if you have your doubts, it’s worth giving the traditional swaddle technique a try. Learning how to swaddle a newborn before baby even arrives—so you can start a routine right away.

If a baby is resisting provide gentle but constant pressure on baby’s arm to straighten it. After a few seconds, the baby’s muscles will relax, and it will be easy to get their arms straight along their sides,” she says. If baby still seems to prefer an arms-up position, you can try swaddling with their arms free or try a swaddle sack that positions their arms in an upright way. The latter option may still help quell the startle reflex.

Some newborns and babies may be content on their own with no swaddling at all. But the fussier baby is, the more a swaddle may become an indispensable calming tool. Don’t give up if baby doesn’t stop crying immediately.: A swaddle may initially make a baby cry more, not less, but once you follow it up with other calming techniques, such as swaying, shushing and other soothing motions, they will likely calm down more readily than if you hadn’t swaddled them.

When to Stop Swaddling Baby

As babies get older, their need for a swaddle will diminish. That’s when you’ll start wondering how to stop swaddling.

Do this by starting to swaddle baby with one arm up and out of the swaddle. If they start to fuss and won’t sleep, they still need the swaddle, she says. But if baby takes to the one-arm swaddle for a week, they’re ready for Operation Swaddle Transition. Slowly wean baby by swaddling them with the second arm out. Regardless of baby’s preference, if they start to roll over (or actively attempt!), it’s no longer safe to use a swaddle, and it’s time to transition away from its use completely. (Sleeping facedown or with loose blankets can increase the risk of suffocation and SIDS) Baby may need to get accustomed to this new sleeping situation, but these are signs that they’re growing and ready to sleep freestyle like a big kid!

Infantile colic

Nurturing the Nurturer postpartum doula insightsWhat is infantile colic? Infantile colic is classified as a functional gastro-intestinal disorder (FGID). FGIDs occur in about 50% of infants, and up to 75% of these infants present with symptoms of more than one FGID. According to literature reviews, infantile colic is estimated to occur in about 20% of…

What is infantile colicInfantile colic is classified as a functional gastro-intestinal disorder (FGID). FGIDs occur in about 50% of infants, and up to 75% of these infants present with symptoms of more than one FGID. According to literature reviews, infantile colic is estimated to occur in about 20% of all infantsOriginally, Wessel and colleagues defined infantile colic in 1954 as episodes of crying for more than three hours a day for more than three days a week for three weeks in an otherwise healthy child. Recently, a group of experts published adapted definitions for both daily practice and clinical research. According to this definition, the diagnosis of colic for clinical purposes must include all of the following: i) an infant who is younger than 5 months of age, ii) presenting with recurrent prolonged periods of infant irritability, fussing, or crying reported by parents that occur without obvious cause and cannot be prevented or resolved by caregivers, iii) without evidence of infant failure to thrive, fever, or ill health. However, for clinical research purposes, in order to diagnose infant colic, the child must meet the clinical criteria plus both of the following: i) caregiver reports that the infant has cried or fussed for three or more hours/day during three or more days in seven days  ii) total 24-hour crying plus fussing in the selected group of infants is confirmed to be three hours or more when measured by a single, prospectively kept, 24-hour behaviour diary.

The crying occurs often in the evening. Colic is reported to occur equally frequently in breastfed and bottle-fed infants and in both sexes. Colic is much more frequent in the first 6 weeks (17–25%) compared with 11% at 8–9 weeks of age and 0.6% at 10–12 weeks of age. Therefore, many guidelines don’t recommend performing diagnostic procedures before the age of four to six months.

Infantile colic typically does not result in long-term problems, although the statement continues with “the crying can cause frustration for the parents, depression following delivery, excess visits to the doctor, and child abuse”. Colic definitely causes stress in the family and impairs family and infant quality of life.

The cause of colic is unknown. The diagnosis of infantile colic requires ruling out other possible causes. Alarm symptoms include fever, poor activity, or a swollen abdomen. But less than 5% of infants with excess crying have an underlying organic disease. One of the major diagnostic challenges is that crying is part of the symptom spectrum of many conditions that occur relatively frequently in infants such as gastro-oesophageal reflux, cow milk protein allergy, etc. However, crying as a “single” or “solitary” manifestation in one of these conditions is rare. In other words, many infants with troublesome gastro-oesophageal reflux do cry a lot, but crying as a single manifestation is a rare presentation of gastro-oesophageal reflux.

Infantile colic pathophysiology is poorly understood. Swallowed air has been suggested as a contributing factor; whether aerophagia should be considered as a cause or consequence is a matter of debate. Over- and under-stimulation are also recognised as causes of infant irritability. Some experts consider that infantile colic is due to gastro-intestinal discomfort or intestinal cramping. Colicky infants display gut microbiota dysbiosis, barrier alterations, and mild chronic gastro-intestinal inflammation. Visceral hypersensitivity could be an important aetiological factor involved in the prototypical colic crying behaviour. Similar perturbations are reported in irritable bowel syndrome. The gastro-intestinal colonisation may develop slower in colicky infants, with a lower diversity and stability. The microbiome of colicky infants has low levels of bifidobacteria and lactobacilli, including species with anti-inflammatory effects. There is a decreased number of butyrate-producing species. Escherichia coli were reported to be more abundant in the faeces of infants with colic than in those of healthy infants. Proteobacteria, including species producing gas and inflammation, are increased. Klebsiella species are detected in larger amounts in colic than in control patients, while enterobacter and pantoea species are present only in the controls. The presence of chronic inflammation was two-fold higher in infants with colic. In all children, during the first few months of life, intestinal mucosal immaturity implies an incomplete gut integrity, thus allowing the passage of large molecules into the blood. Breastfed and formula-fed infants with infantile colic have an increased transmission of the macromolecule human α-lactalbumin (a protein that regulates the production of lactose) across the gut compared with healthy, age-matched infants. While the development of barrier function occurs in utero, there is ongoing postnatal maturation, and multiple factors can induce postnatal intestinal barrier maturation, including growth factors, hormones, nutrients, and microbes.

Management

Many paediatricians do not feel very confident in dealing with infantile colic, which is related to the fact that there is no evidence-based approach to manage persistent infant crying. Parental reassurance is the cornerstone of the management of infantile colic. Since infantile colic decreases from the age of three months and disappears by the age of four to six months, it is obvious that any proposed therapeutic intervention should be devoid of any risk of adverse effects. The placebo effect of any therapeutic intervention is important and may reach up to 50%. However, some parents and families tolerate crying better than others. Interventions are targeted to decrease crying and bolster the infant–family relationship. Reassurance that the infant is not sick is of major importance, and it may necessitate multiple consultations before the parents become confident with this idea. The goals of management are to help the parents cope with the crying and to prevent long-term sequelae in the parent–child relationship. Infant colic is a risk factor for child abuse.

Although there is no evidence for the benefit of soothing techniques, they cost nothing, are devoid of adverse effects, and have the advantage that active recommendations are given to the parents. There are the five manoeuvres (the five S’s), a group of reflexes (vestibular, auditory, and tactile) that work together to calm the baby: swaddling, shushing, stomach position, swinging, and sucking. Regarding manipulation therapies, a Cochrane analysis concluded that studies were generally small and methodologically prone to bias. Osteopathy is considered to have no benefit, and this is also based on the fact that there is hardly any data.

Infants with colic seem to be in pain. However, the evidence of the effectiveness of pain-relieving agents for the treatment of infantile colic is sparse and prone to bias. Moreover, similar to irritable bowel syndrome in adults, infantile colic may rather be the consequence of a decreased pain threshold than an increased intensity of pain, as the microbiome is associated with the level of pain threshold.

Despite some positive reports from parents, there is no evidence to support the use of simethicone as a pain-relieving agent for infantile colic. Simethicone is an anti-foaming agent used to reduce bloating, discomfort, or pain caused by excessive gas.

In breastfed infants, the evidence for maternal dietary manipulation is weak. There is no evidence to recommend an elimination diet, e.g. without cow’s milk, for a breastfeeding mother to improve infant crying. Two systematic reviews from 2012 of small randomised trials with methodologic limitations suggest that extensive hydrolysate formula may reduce distress in infants with colic. Fibre-supplemented formula had no effect. If the baby is growing well and if crying is the only symptom, there is no evidence that an extensive hydrolysate will be of help. In atopic families, there may be some benefit, although this is advised based on clinical thinking and experience and not on evidence. Breastfeeding should be continued.

Limited data suggest that using a partially hydrolysed infant formula may be of some benefit in reducing infantile colic in cases where cow’s milk allergy is not suspected in formula-fed infants. Whether this is due to the protein hydrolysate or to the reduced lactose content of these formula is not clear. Some old data suggest a beneficial effect of lactose reduction in the infant’s diet as a result of administration of exogenous lactase, based on the theory that infants with colic may have transient lactose intolerance because of slow maturation of lactase. There is some evidence that oral lactase can reduce crying time. The United Kingdom National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (NICE) guidelines recommend a trial of 2 weeks’ administration of lactase. In some of these studies, the tested formula contains another lipid and/or prebiotics or probiotics as well. Thus, although dietary changes can result in a beneficial outcome, there is limited evidence as to which specific dietary change is causing the effect. Removal of poorly digested carbohydrates from the infant’s diet has promise, but additional clinical studies must be conducted before a recommendation can be made. In breastfed infants, the evidence for maternal dietary manipulation with lactase, sucrose, or glucose is weak.

Dietary advice can best be summarised as follows. For breastfed infants, a monitored low-allergen maternal diet avoiding cow’s milk and dairy food with appropriate intake of vitamins and minerals should be adopted for at least two weeks. If there is no improvement, the elimination diet should be stopped. Infantile colic is not a reason to stop breastfeeding. For bottle-fed infants, the first-line approach recommended in infants who are not suspected of suffering from cow’s milk protein allergy are formula with partially hydrolysed whey proteins, with reduced lactose with prebiotic oligosaccharides and probiotics. It is important to recommend only the formula for which there is some evidence of efficacy in the literature. Extensively hydrolysed formula based on casein or whey could be useful in children with cow’s milk protein allergy; most of the time, these infants present with more severe colic and with other manifestations of atopic disease, such as atopic dermatitis. It is crucial that dietary changes are performed under the supervision of a healthcare provider.

Available evidence shows that herbal agents, sugar, and cimetropium bromide cannot be recommended for infants with colic. Preparations containing fennel are suggested to be effective in breastfed infants, with an overall mean difference of –72.1 minutes of crying/day. Mentha piperita was reported to be beneficial in one trial. Dicycloverine, also known as dicyclomine, relieves muscle spasms in the gastro-intestinal tract through an apparent mechanism of nonselective smooth muscle relaxation, and that presents a range of anticholinergic side effects such as a dry mouth, nausea, and, at higher doses, deliriant effects. Since efficacy was never shown, and because of the adverse effects, this drug should not be used in infantile colic. Cimetropium bromide is a belladonna derivative. Evidence does not support its use in infantile colic. Reported adverse effects include constipation, pupil dilatation with loss of accommodation, photophobia, reduced bronchial secretions, heart rhythm variability, and skin flushing.

Acid blockers such as proton pump inhibitors, which are the recommended treatment for gastro-oesophageal reflux disease, do not provide any relief in colicky infants. Although crying is frequently reported in infants with gastro-oesophageal reflux disease, crying itself is not an indicator of the condition. Moreover, acid-blocking medication contributes to the development of an unbalanced gastro-intestinal microbiome, which is a risk factor for allergy and gastro-intestinal and respiratory tract infections.

What about probiotics? Lactobacillus reuteri DSM 17938 is a well-documented, effective, and safe treatment mainly in breastfed infants. Analysis of response rates showed that infants receiving L. reuteri DSM 17938 had a 2.3-fold greater chance of having a 50% or greater decrease in crying/fussing time compared to controls. However, two trials in mainly formula-fed infants failed to show a significant benefit.

The reasons for the crying in formula-fed infants may differ from those in breastfed infants. In a recent trial, mechanisms of action have been suggested. Breastfed infants with colic treated with L. reuteri DSM 17938 for 30 days had a significantly decreased crying time and an increased FOXP3 concentration, resulting in a decreased RORγ–FOXP3 ratio. The treatment reduced faecal calprotectin (inflammation in the intestines). The outcome of trials with Lactobacillus rhamnosus GG was negative. These findings suggest once more that data obtained with one probiotic strain cannot be extrapolated to other strains. In all trials, probiotic supplementation was not associated with any adverse events. Although probiotics are Generally Regarded As Safe (“GRAS” status assigned by the US Food and Drug Administration).

One should be very careful in recommending or even accepting so-called alternative treatments because, besides the fact that they are unlikely to be effective, they may be harmful. Homeopathic remedies often are considered nontoxic because of the low concentrations of active ingredients. However, the labels of homeopathic products may not report all of the ingredients, some of which potentially may be toxic. As an example, gas chromatography-mass spectrometry analysis of a homeopathic remedy for colic that was associated with an increased risk of apparent life-threatening events found that it contained ethanol, propanol, and pentanol in addition to three potentially toxic substances that were listed as active ingredients ( Citrullus colocynthis [bitter apple], Veratrum album [white hellebore], and Strychnos nux-vomica [strychnine tree]). Spinal manipulation does not reduce the duration of crying associated with colic and does not enhance recovery.

Prevention

Prevention is, of course, always preferable to management, especially in the absence of an effective treatment. L. reuteri DSM 17938 was shown in a preventive trial to decrease all FGIDs, including colic. In another prevention trial, the same strain was shown to result in a lower number of paediatric consultations related to episodes of infant colic than the control group. L. reuteri DSM 17938 supplementation could reduce parental discomfort due to infantile colic.

Conclusion

Infantile colic is distressing to parents whose infant is inconsolable during crying episodes. The physician’s role is to make sure that the crying is not a result of other causes, offer balanced advice on treatments, and provide support to the family. Above all, parents need reassurance that their baby is healthy and that colic is self-limited with no long-term adverse effects.

Treatment possibilities for infantile colic are limited. Evidence suggests that manipulation of the gastro-intestinal microbiome may be of some benefit. L. reuteri DSM 17938 is the best-studied probiotic for colic, especially in breastfed infants. Some data suggest that dead or tyndallized bacteria may be of benefit as well, perhaps as a result of reduced gut permeability. A Cochrane review showed that the evidence for the effectiveness of pain-relieving agents for the treatment of infantile colic is scanty and prone to bias. Data on pain-relieving agents for infantile colic are from old studies with a small number of patients with serious methodological limitations. As a consequence, additional randomised controlled trials are needed.

Recent advances in understanding and managing infantile colic

Siel Daelemans, Writing – Review & Editing,1 Linde Peeters, Writing – Review & Editing,1 Bruno Hauser, Writing – Review & Editing,1 and Yvan Vandenplas, Conceptualization, Methodology, Validation, Writing – Original Draft Preparation

Constipation in babies

 Nurturing the Nurturer postpartum doula insights

What is normal?

The consistency (hardness or softness) of your baby’s poo depends on what he or she is being fed. It also varies over time as solids are introduced to the diet, and as your baby’s digestive system becomes more mature.

Some parents worry that their baby is constipated if they don’t do a poo every day. In some babies, there may be several days between each bowel movement, and that is often not a problem.

Babies fed with breast milk only tend to have quite loose and runny stools to begin with. Their stools begin to get a bit firmer and less frequent over time. There can also be a big variation in how much breastfed babies poo. Some breastfed babies poo several times a day and some may poo only once or twice a week. This range is normal.

Babies fed with formula tend to have slightly firmer stools than breastfed babies, and they have fewer bowel movements.

Once solids are introduced (at about 6 months of age), poo will become slightly firmer again.

These variations are all part of your baby’s normal development — healthy poo can range from being loose and runny, to being soft but firm.

  • Breastfed babies may have a poo following each feed, or only one poo each week.
  • Bottle-fed formula babies and older children will usually have a poo at least every one to three days.

Constipation is a common problem in children, particularly around the time of toilet training or starting solids. It can also become a problem after a child has had a painful or frightening bowel movement.

What are the signs of constipation?

The most important sign of constipation is that the poo is hard and dry or crumbly and it looks like marbles. Other signs of constipation in babies are:

  • Your baby is crying and looks uncomfortable before doing a poo. (Some straining is normal when babies do a poo; this usually does not mean constipation.)
  • The poo or wind smells bad.
  • Your baby isn’t eating as much.
  • Your baby has a hard belly.

If the poo is very hard, it can sometimes cause small tears to form around your baby’s anus (back passage). These little tears can bleed and can cause your baby more pain and discomfort.

What you can do

Don’t give your baby medicines for constipation unless they are advised or prescribed by a doctor.

If your baby is fed with breast milk:

  • You may need to feed your baby more often. See your doctor or child health nurse for advice.

If your baby is fed with formula:

  • It may be that his or her formula has not been made up correctly, so it does not contain enough water.
  • Double check that you are following the instructions on the tin of formula correctly.
  • Make sure you are using the scoop that is provided with the tin of formula you are using — different brands can have different sized scoops.
  • Make sure you are not packing the powdered formula too tightly in the scoop — it should be loosely filled, and levelled off using the flat side of a knife or the leveler provided.
  • Make sure you are adding water to the bottle first, then the powdered formula. If you add formula first you will be adding too little water to the bottle.

If your baby is eating solids (from age 6 months):

  • Offer extra water between their normal meals or diluted fruit juice (especially prune juice), 1 part juice to 3 parts water.
  • Try to encourage them to eat extra servings of fruit and vegetables that have been pureed or chopped (depending on their ability to chew). These can include stewed prunes, stewed apricots, and steamed vegetables.
  • Add more water to your baby’s solids.

Other things to try:

  • Gently move your baby’s legs in a cycling motion — this may help stimulate their bowels.
  • Gently massage your baby’s tummy.
  • A warm bath can help the muscles relax (your baby may do the poo in the bath, so be prepared).

When to seek help

Very rarely, constipation can be a sign of an underlying health problem. If a baby under 6 weeks is constipated, you will need an assessment by a doctor to exclude an underlying condition.

Take your baby to a doctor, or seek help from a midwife or child health nurse if:

  • your baby’s poo is dry and crumbly or like pellets, or they seem to have pain and discomfort when doing a poo
  • your baby is constipated and they are gaining weight slowly
  • they have blood in their poo

Sources:

Eat for Health (Infant feeding guidelines)Reflux Infants Support Association (Constipation, Motility Disorders and GORD in Children)The Royal Children’s Hospital Melbourne (Constipation)The Sydney Children’s Hospitals Network (Constipation)

Bottle feeding and reducing wind

Nurturing the Nurturer postpartum doula insights

Bottle Feeding: How to aide digestion and reduce wind

Breastfed babies are used to controlling how much milk they take at each feed. They come off the breast when they’ve had enough.

However, when babies are fed from a bottle, they have less control. It’s easy to overfeed a baby as they will tend to take more milk than they really need at each feed.   

Breastfed babies are also used to being able to control the flow of milk as they feed. They may find it quite stressful feeding from a teat with a fast flow. The baby may look like they are very hungry and gulping the milk down. However, they might just be swallowing fast so they don’t choke.   

One way to avoid both of these problems is to pace the bottle feeds. 

This information is relevant for Mums and carers. Anyone feeding a baby with a bottle can use paced feeding techniques. 

It applies whether you are feeding expressed breastmilk or formula to the baby. In both cases, prepare and offer feeds in small amounts.  

What is paced bottle feeding? Paced bottle feeding is a method of feeding your baby that mimics breastfeeding. As the name suggests, it involves pacing your feedings to allow baby to be in “control” of, process, and recognize his own “satiety,” or feeling of fullness. Baby is going to eat more slowly and work harder to get the milk (like they would with breast-feeding) as opposed to typical bottle feeding.

  1. Baby is angled more upright
  2. Caregiver tickles baby’s lips with bottle
  3. Nipple is then put into baby’s mouth
  4. The bottle is held horizontally, which slows the flow significantly, try keeping the nipple full
  5. After 20–30 seconds of feeding, the bottle is tipped downward or removed from baby’s mouth to stop the flow of milk (creating a similar pattern as in breastfeeding)

How to bottle feed the breast-fed baby: Paced bottle feeding These tips are designed to replicate breast-feeding for breast-fed babies while mum’s away, but they can absolutely be helpful for formula-fed babies too! When should baby be fed? Whenever baby is hungry.  A schedule can be helpful as a loose guideline (for example, feeding baby every 2–3 hours), but look for feeding cues first and foremost instead of going by the clock.

Some signs baby is hungry include:

  • Smaking lips
  • Sucking fists
  • Rooting (baby turning with mouth wide open toward any object that touches her cheek)
  • Acting fussy or restless

Baby position Hold baby in an upright position, as opposed to laying down. This helps baby to control the flow of milk better. They don’t have to be at an uncomfortable 90-degree angle, but only slightly reclined so that the bottle isn’t pouring down into baby’s mouth.

Offer the bottle horizontally Lay the bottle nipple across baby’s lips (nipple pointed up) when baby starts rooting and opening his mouth. Let baby draw the nipple into his mouth and close his lips on the base of the nipple. Baby essentially is going to “latch” on the bottle nipple like he would a breast. Once he’s latched on, keep the bottle horizontal. This allows baby to control the flow of milk better. This also helps the bottle to last the entire length of a normal feeding, usually 10–20 minutes, rather than baby gulping a bottle down in 5 minutes.

Baby learns to recognize when they’re full because they are not filling their belly before the signals of satiety can reach their brain You may also consider not allowing the milk to reach the nipple of the bottle for a few minutes while baby sucks. This mimics the letdown of breast-feeding and can help reduce the chances of nipple preference. Babies at the breast will pause and take breaks often throughout a feeding. Baby’s caregiver should encourage pausing while bottle-feeding as well. If baby gets tense or starts gulping, lean them forward to allow the milk to flow away from the nipple to give them a break. If they pauses on their own, great!

Switch sides Just as mum does while breast-feeding, move baby from one side to the other halfway through the feeding. This helps baby avoid a side preference, and allows for new views and eye contact, which is excellent for their development. Also after burping allow baby to relax and lie down after the halfway mark for 10 min. This will help digestion.

Ending the feeding One big drawback of bottle feeding is the risk of over-feeding. Look for cues that baby may be getting full, such as:

  • Slower sucking
  • Eyes wandering
  • Falling asleep
  • Hands are open and relaxed

When you think baby’s getting close to being full, remove the nipple from their mouth by gently twisting. Offer it again, and if they accept, give them about 10 sucks, and repeat until they refuse. This will help teach them the feelings of satiety and reduce the chance of over-feeding. Likewise, don’t coerce baby into drinking the last few drops of milk in the bottle. If they fall asleep, they are finished (an exception being newborns who may need to be awakened in the first few days to feed).

Benefits of paced bottle feeding Breast-feeding is the biological design, so it makes sense that we would want to recreate this dynamic as best we can when bottle feeding. Paced bottle feeding has many benefits, which will help your child both in the short and long-term. Baby avoids being under- or over-fed. If the caregiver is in charge of when and how much baby eats, baby is not likely to get the correct amount of milk. Paced bottle feeding helps baby be in charge, just like when they are at the breast. Less stressful for baby Babies can become very stressed when laid on their backs to eat from a bottle. When baby swallows milk from a bottle, the negative pressure forces more milk out of the bottle. Baby has to keep gulping to avoid choking. Paced feeding gives baby the time and space to eat at his or her own pace. Avoid colic Proper feeding techniques and a good bottle can minimize colic-like symptoms. When milk pours into baby’s mouth, as happens with conventional bottle feeding, baby gulps to keep up, ingesting air in the process, which can cause gas. Easier pumping for mum If baby is being over-fed, mum needs to continually pump extra milk to replace the milk that’s being fed. Sometimes this leads to muma believing she has low milk supply. When baby is in charge, it’s much more likely that the amount mum pumps is exactly what baby needs. Supports breast-feeding relationship Using a feeding technique that resembles breast-feeding is a great way to support the breast-feeding relationship and avoid a bottle preference. We are learning that babies don’t struggle as much with “nipple confusion” as with “flow preference.” If you are consistently giving a breast-fed baby fast-flowing bottles, they will probably prefer that easier, faster milk versus the breast. May improve health later in life One reason that breast-feeding is so great is that it allows baby to eat at his own pace, allowing him to learn his body’s cues for satiety. Studies have found that bottle feeding plays a large part in teaching overeating. Therefore, paced bottle feeding may contribute to healthier eating habits in the future. Will paced bottle feeding make my baby gassy? When I first saw demos of this feeding method, I instantly thought of baby getting gassier. However, many lactation consultants say that air isn’t what causes gas. It’s more due to baby’s immature nervous and digestive systems. If you notice an increase in gas, switch to a breast-shaped nipple bottle, which is slow flow. Also, try holding the bottle more horizontally so that less air interferes with the feeding.

Final word on paced bottle feeding Whether you’re going back to work full-time, part-time, are exclusively pumping, or feed formula, paced bottle feeding can be a great way to support yourself, and especially, your baby.

Sleep schedules

Nurturing the Nurturer postpartum doula insights

In the first couple mths, you’re home with a newborn and they are super sleepy. It feels so easy. Like you’ve got this sleep thing down. A few little rocks in the chair or pats on the bottom and zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. And then…they get a few months older and they are AWAKE! They suddenly become harder to settle into sleep. And then, the baby is overtired, which makes it EVEN MORE hard to fall asleep. We are all exhausted!! I’ve been right where you are.

Note: During the first 3-4 weeks of the newborn phase, there is no need to stress over implementing a schedule. You can simply try to do feedings every 2.5-3 hrs at a minimum during the day and loosely try to follow the eat/wake/sleep cycle as described below.

How to Create a Baby Sleep Schedule Right around 5-6 weeks old, is a good age to put babies on a sleep rhythm. This need not be to the minute. Think: round about timing here. but a good sleep routine / schedule can make ALL the difference when helping your baby start to settle into sleep easier.  It also helps your anxiety if you worry about your baby getting enough/too much sleep but remember ‘close enough is good enough.’  When your baby is unsettled you can look at the time and think ‘oh wow it’s that time, no wonder he/she’s acting up’ or ‘it’s nearly nap time so I’ll put you down now as you are unsettled’.

1. Components of a good schedule. First, let’s explore what a good schedule may involve. Lets’ lay out all the pieces and then place them where they seem to fit best. Morning wake up time Nap times Number of naps Feeding times Play times Bed time

2. Getting the eat/wake/sleep cycle down. The eat/wake/sleep cycle is a great way to help your baby transition to a great schedule. First, the baby wakes from sleep and EATS a full feeding. Second, the baby is AWAKE to play for an approximate designated period of time. Lastly, the baby goes back to SLEEP for a nap or bedtime after showing a sleepy cue (e.g. a yawn, fuss or eye rub). This cycle repeats itself throughout the day, and during the night (if the baby is still taking night feeds) the cycle is simply EAT/SLEEP. The baby would eat and then go back down to sleep until he needed another feeding.

3. How does a schedule help sleep? Routines and schedules help our children learn what to expect. Like I’ve said before, the world is a very chaotic place for children, and routines provide a sense of safety and security overtime. They also help your child feel confident and comfortable, knowing what comes next in a day to day routine. Routines also help cue children for sleep. After a certain series of events (like play, then lunch, then pre-nap routine for example) a child will learn to expect sleep shortly thereafter if it is done similarly every day. In addition, if your child goes to sleep for naps and bedtime at approximately the same time every day, they will likely be tired around the same time every day.

4. Sample schedules. Here are just a few examples of schedules to help get you started. Ultimately you will need to look at what your baby is telling you with regards to wake time and duration of naps. I have used a 7:00 am wake up time and a 7:30 bedtime. So you will notice that is what the sample schedules revolve around. Use these schedules as a tool or guide to help you and then adjust the times so they best serve your child and your family. Any wake up time between 6-8 am is ideal, and any bedtime between 6-8 pm is ideal. So go ahead and choose a morning wake up time and a bedtime and then fill in the naps and feedings throughout the daytime.

And lastly before you get started, REMEMBER…always feed your baby when he is hungry, always add in more feedings when needed, and know all times are just approximate. Children aren’t robots; flexibility is key!

2.5 hr schedule: A schedule common anywhere from 1 to 3 mths. Always add in more feedings if needed. For the first few mths, you can try cluster feeding every 2 hrs in the evening. Most babies are very fussy during that time, and regardless if they were truly hungry or not, nursing them helped get us through that tough part of the day. 07:00 am wake up for the day, eat, play 08:00 am nap 09:30 am wake, eat, play 10:30 am nap 12:00 pm wake, eat, play 1:00 pm nap 2:30 pm wake, eat, play 3:30 pm nap 5:00 pm wake, eat, play 6:30 pm bedtime routine, bath, bottle 7:00 pm bed, down for the night 10-11 pm Dream feed (if desired) 11 pm-7 am night feeds (as many as your baby needs)

Note: the dream feed typically becomes more disruptive than helpful after the 4 mth mark. It is only intended to be helpful when your baby is still young. It’s up to you if you think it will help. There are both pros and cons. Honestly, I think it could go either way.

3 hr schedule: A schedule common from 2-6 mths. Some babies can tolerate a 3 hr schedule earlier than 2 mths old. It really depends on how much your baby weighed at birth, how long your baby can stay awake, and how many feedings your baby requires during the daytime. If you are feeding more frequently than every 3 hrs during the night, you may want to stay on a 2.5 hr schedule for a bit longer until your baby drops a night feeding. The theory behind it is the more feedings your baby receives during the day, the less he may need during the night. Some babies are ready to move on to the 3.5 hr or 4 hr schedule around the 4 mths mark, while other babies need to remain on a 3 hr schedule for a bit longer. Again, listen to your baby and do what you think is best.

 07:00 am wake up for the day, eat, play 08:30 am nap 10:00 am wake up, eat, play 11:30 am nap 1:00 pm wake up, eat, play 2:30 pm nap 4:00 pm wake up, eat, play 5:00-5:30 pm cat nap 7:00 pm bath, bedtime routine, eat, down for the night 10-11 pm dream feed (if desired)11 pm – 7 am night feeds as needed

3.5 hr schedule: A transitional schedule to use during the 3-6 mths age range if needed before moving to a 4 hr schedule. Sometimes this is skipped all together and the baby is moved straight from a 3 hr schedule to a 4 hr schedule. 07:00 am wake up for the day, eat, play 08:45 am nap 10:30 am wake, eat, play 12:15 pm nap 1:45 pm wake, eat, play 3:30 pm nap 5:00 pm wake, eat, play 7:00 pm bath, bedtime routine, bottle, down for the night 10-11 pm dream feed (if desired)11 pm – 7 am night feeds as needed

4 hr schedule (3 naps): A schedule common during the 4-6 mth age range. The 4 hr schedule is a huge milestone! Once your baby reaches the 4 hr schedule, he will basically be on such a feeding schedule indefinitely. As adults, it is most common to eat about every 4 hrs during the day. Once your baby is taking solids, you may end up adding 1-2 snacks during the day, which is totally fine. 07:00 am wake up for the day, eat (+solids if started), play 09:00 am nap1 1:00 am wake, eat (+solids if started), play 1:00 pm nap 3:00 pm wake, eat (+solids, if started), play 5:00-5:30 pm catnap 5:30 pm possibly solids during dinner with the family 7:00 pm bath, bedtime routine, bottle, down for the night 7 pm – 7 am night feeds if needed

Dream feed: This is usually the age range when the dream feed is dropped as it becomes more disruptive to sleep.

Note: During the 6-9 mth age range your child should be able to drop the third nap (the cat nap) and you will be down to 2 naps per day.

4 hr schedule (2 naps):A schedule common for 6+ mths 07:00 am wake up for the day, eat (+solids), play 09:00 am nap 11:00 am wake, eat (+solids), play 1:00 pm nap 3:00 pm wake, eat, play 5:00 pm dinner with family 7:00 pm bath, bedtime routine, bottle, down for the night 7 pm – 7 am night feeds if needed. Talk with your peadiatrician about what age would be appropriate for night weaning.

Note: When your baby is ready (usually during 6-9 mths) go ahead and drop from 3 naps to 2 naps. Then you will basically stay on this schedule (outside of maybe shortening naps and increasing wake time when needed) until your child is ready to transition down to one nap (typically during the 14-18 mth age range).

4 hr schedule (1 nap )A schedule common for 14+ mths 07:00 am wake up for the day, eat breakfast, play 09:30 am possible morning snack if needed 11:30 am lunch 1230-1:00 pm nap starts 3:00-4:00 pm nap ends 3:30 pm snack (or whenever nap ends) 5:30 pm dinner with family 7:00 pm bath, bedtime routine, cup or bottle with milk, down for the night.

Note: Once your child is ready to transition to one nap (typically during the 14-18 mth age range), you will remain on a similar schedule until your child stops napping.

Print these sleep routine charts to keep parents, grandparents and babysitters ALL on the same page.

Newborn sleep patterns

Nurturing the Nurturer postpartum doula insights

Newborn sleep patterns: Are there any?

To the sleepless parent, newborn sleep might seem totally disorganised. For example, consider these points.

1. Newborns never sleep for long. Newborns sleep in short bouts — typically ranging from 30 minutes to 4 hours — at seemingly random times throughout the day and night.

2. Newborns awaken easily. In part, this is because they spend a large portion of their sleep time in “active sleep,” a light sleep state characterized by fluttering eyelids; rapid, irregular breathing; occasional body movements; and vocalizations (grunts or brief cries).

3. Newborn sleep times can vary widely. In the first few days, the average newborn sleeps between 16-18 hours a day (Iglowstein et al 2002). By four weeks, newborn sleep averages about 14 hours. But the range is considerable. Some four-week-old babies sleep as little as 9 out of 24 hours. Others sleep for 19 hours a day (Iglowstein et al 2002).

If your baby doesn’t fit the typical profile, does that mean something is wrong?

Not necessarily. Some babies suffer from medical conditions that influence the way they sleep, so if you have concerns you should discuss them with your medical provider. But it appears that many healthy, normal newborns deviate several hours from the average duration of sleep.

Newborn sleep rhythms: Why newborns seem to sleep—and wake—around the clock The timing of adult sleep is governed by circadian rhythms — physiological changes that follow a 24-hour cycle. Many of these changes are influenced by your exposure to light.

For instance, when you expose yourself to sunlight during the day, you are helping your body calibrate its internal clock. Even if you are sleep-deprived, morning light helps ensure that you will be more alert during the day than you are at night.

Conversely, the absence of light at night helps your body wind down. When darkness falls, your brain interprets this as a signal to start producing melatonin, a hormone that triggers relaxation, paving the way for sleep.

You can easily disrupt this process by exposing yourself to artificial light sources in the evening — especially sources of blue light (Wahnschaffe et al 2013). But as long as you stick with the program — bright light during the day, and darkness at night — you will likely find yourself in sync with the natural, 24-hour day.

And of course most adults are in sync. But it’s different for newborns.

Newborn sleep is not governed by strong circadian rhythms. Things don’t begin that way. Not when babies are still in the womb. During pregnancy, fetuses are tuned into their mothers’ physiological cues about day and night.

Fetal heart and respiratory rates speed up when a mother is active. They slow down when a mother is sleeping (Mirmiran et al 2003). Such changes may be influenced by maternal hormones, particularly melatonin. Maternal melatonin passes through the placenta, and may direct the fetus’ internal clock (Torres-Farfan et al 2006).

But after birth, this intimate hormonal connection is broken. Newborns must develop their own circadian rhythms of hormone production.

Unfortunately for us, this takes time (Kennaway 1996), and the process is complicated by the fact that newborns need to feed every few hours. As a result, newborn sleep episodes tend to be brief, and spaced at fairly regular intervals around the clock.

So when do babies develop mature circadian rhythms?

It’s normal for babies to take 12 weeks, or even longer. Most infants take about 12 weeks to show day-night rhythms in the production of melatonin (Rivkees 2003). Circadian changes in cortisol, a hormone that helps regulate alertness, may take even longer to emerge (Rivkees 2003). And, overall, babies may take 3-5 months before they “settle” at night–meaning that they sleep for more than 5 hours at a stretch (Jenni et al 2006; Pinilla and Birch 1993).

Nevertheless, newborn sleep isn’t completely divorced from the natural rhythms of the 24-hour day. Studies show that circadian rhythms begin developing in the first days after birth.

For example, German and Japanese studies have reported that newborns sleep more at night than they do during the day (Freudigman and Thoman 1998; Korte 2004; Matsuoka et al 1991).

And scientific evidence suggests that even newborns are receptive to environmental cues about time. You can take advantage of this fact to help shape newborn sleep patterns.

How to help newborns get in sync with the natural, 24-hour day

1. Make your baby a part of your daily routine. When parents include their newborns in their daily activities, newborn may adapt more rapidly to the 24-hour day (Custodio et al 2007; Lorh et al 1999). One study took continuous measurements of mother-infant activity patterns for four months after birth. Newborns who were active at the same time of day as their mothers were quicker to develop mature circadian rhythms (Wulff and Siegmund 2002).

2. Reduce stimulation at night. When your baby wakes for night time feedings, keep activity to a minimum. Make as little noise as possible, and avoid moving your baby around. Ideally, you want to avoid waking them “all the way up.” But if that isn’t possible, at least try to minimize the hustle and bustle. You want the baby to learn that nighttime is for sleep and quiet.

3. Expose your newborn to natural lighting patterns. Light cues might not instantly synchronize newborn sleep patterns, but they help.

For example, in one study, newborns slept longer at night if their parents observed a regular policy of turning out the lights by 9pm (Iwata et al 2017).

In another study, young babies tended to sleep longer at night if they had been exposed to lots of early afternoon light (Harrison 2004). 

And time spent outdoors might make an important difference. Babies who go outside experience much higher daytime light levels than those kept indoors all day, and may develop stronger circadian rhythms as a result (Tsai et al 2012).

4. Try infant massage. A recent experiment found that mothers assigned to massage their newborns with lotion at bedtime experienced better newborn sleep outcomes than mothers who massaged without lotion and mothers in a control group who didn’t massage at all.

After one month, newborns massaged with lotion were falling asleep faster, staying asleep longer, and awakening at night less often. Mothers using lotion actually massaged their infants more frequently, which may explain the results (Field et al 2016). An earlier study found that infant massage helped newborns develop more mature patterns of melatonin secretion (Ferber 2002).

The takeaway? More research is needed on this topic (Bennett et al 2013), but meanwhile, this seems worth a try.

5. Do you pump and store breast milk? Consider keeping a record of what time of day you express. Breast milk contains tryptophan, an amino acid that is used by the body to manufacture melatonin. Tryptophan levels rise and fall according to maternal circadian rhythms, and when infants consume tryptophan before bedtime, they fall asleep faster (Steinberg et al 1992).

It’s therefore possible that breastfeeding helps newborn sleep patterns synchronize with the 24-hour day (Cubero et al 2005). This hypothesis was tested by feeding infants formula fortified with varying concentrations of tryptophan. When infants were given low levels of tryptophan during the day and high concentrations at night (mimicking the natural fluctuations of breast milk), infants fell asleep faster at night and got more sleep overall (Cubero et al 2007).

Newborn sleep cycles: Why newborns are light sleepers When adults first fall asleep, we pass through a couple of light sleep stages, and then plunge into a bout of deep sleep.

Afterwards, we switch into REM, or “rapid eye movement” sleep, a sleep stage famous for its association with dreaming, and the loss of muscle tone. We don’t move much during REM.

When REM is over, we either awaken, or return to light sleep and begin the cycle again. For the average adult, a single sleep cycle lasts about 90-100 minutes. We may partially awaken many times during the night. But we’re more likely to wake up “all the way” during transitions between stages, during light sleep, and during REM. 

Newborn sleep is also characterized by sleep stages and cycles, but there are crucial differences. First, babies typically begin their sleep bouts in the newborn equivalent of REM (sometimes called “active sleep”).  

Second, newborns in REM don’t usually experience muscle atonia.

Unlike us, they may thrash around, stretch, twitch, and even vocalize. The results can fool parents into thinking their babies are waking up, when they are actually experiencing normal REM sleep. 

Third, newborn sleep cycles are shorter — around 50-55 minutes for the average infant — and REM makes up a much bigger proportion of sleep.

It’s not unusual for newborns to spend more than half their total sleep time in REM (Grigg-Damberger 2016). Indeed, several studies suggest that, over the course of a 24-hour day, some newborns may spend as much as 75% of their sleep time in active sleep (e.g., Poblano et al 2007; Sadeh et al 1996). 

Fourth, while newborns do experience something roughly analogous to deep sleep, this stage, called “quiet sleep,” is potentially dangerous.

Characterized by slower, more rhythmic breathing, quiet sleep appears more restful (Grigg-Damberger 2016). But it’s harder for babies to awaken from quiet sleep, which can cause trouble if the baby isn’t getting enough oxygen.

This may explain why newborns don’t oblige exhausted parents by lapsing into long periods of deep sleep. It’s too risky. Instead, the typical 50-55 minute newborn sleep cycle includes only about 20 minutes of quiet sleep.

The rest of the time, babies are either in REM or in “transitional sleep,” a rather restless state that looks like a mash-up of active and quiet sleep, and which scientists don’t yet understand (Grigg-Damberget 2016). 

Put this all together, and you can see why parents feel their babies are such light (and erratic) sleepers. Like adults, newborns are more likely to awaken during REM, and during transitions between sleep stages. But unlike adults, newborns spend a lot more time in REM, and they transition between cycles more frequently. 

And parents may sometimes mistake REM restlessness for waking — and attempt to interact with or soothe a baby at the wrong time. In short, there are lots of opportunities for babies to wake up — or get awakened unnecessarily.

This sounds like a raw deal for parents. But newborns probably benefit from being light sleepers.  Having a low threshold of arousal may protect babies from SIDS, and active sleep might be crucial for a newborn’s brain development (Heraghty et al 2008; Seigel 2005).

And if we understand the peculiar nature of newborn REM, we can learn to avoid jumping in too soon when we think a baby is awakening or signalling for us.

A baby who seems to be waking up may, if left alone, go back to sleep very rapidly.

How to keep your light sleeper from waking up all the way

1. Don’t rush in the moment you think your baby has awakened. As noted, babies experience frequent arousals, but that doesn’t mean they are doomed to wake up “all the way” every few minutes. Babies often jerk, sigh, or vocalize during partial arousals. If you avoid stimulating them during these moments, they may go back to sleep on their own.

2. Tank up the baby before you go to sleep. Whether you breastfeed or bottle-fed, try to give the baby an especially large meal before your own bedtime. This will encourage your baby to sleep longer. To learn more about this approach, see this Parenting Science guide to “Dream feeding.”

3. If you feed your baby formula, try to find one that includes DHA. DHA is a fatty acid found in fish oil and other dietary sources. It’s important for brain development, and may play a role in shaping sleep patterns as well.

In one study, children who consumed low levels of DHA had reduced amount of slow-wave (deep) sleep (Faglioli et al 1989).

In another study, pregnant women with higher blood levels of DHA gave birth to babies who spent more time in quiet sleep (Cheruku et al 2002).

DHA is found in breast milk, so it’s plausible (though unproven) that boosting a nursing mother’s DHA intake could improve a newborn’s sleep patterns. If you use formula, it seems like a good idea to find a baby formula that contains DHA.

4. Check out the article on baby sleep aids.  There you’ll find tips for improving newborn sleep, and avoiding practices that are either unhelpful or potentially hazardous.

What about you? Tips for improving your own sleep

Newborn sleep patterns take their toll on parents. In a study tracking the sleep patterns of mothers from pregnancy through the postpartum period, maternal sleep worsened after childbirth and continued to deteriorate until about 12 weeks postpartum (Kang et al 2002)—the time when newborn sleep patterns begin to show marked circadian rhythms (Nishihara et al 2000).

Twelve weeks isn’t forever, but it can seem like it when you are severely sleep restricted. As you struggle to cope with newborn sleep patterns, don’t forget to look after yourself.

 Here are some tips to help you cope.

1. Appreciate the power of a 30-minute nap When you’re running up an enormous sleep debt, you might think a 30-minute nap will make little difference to your health.

But recent research confirms that all naps are not the same. When you’re sleep deprived, the brain compensates by rendering naps more restorative than usual.

In one study, volunteers permitted to sleep only 2 hours at night showed the typical abnormalities in their stress hormone and immune factor chemistry. But after just two 30-minute naps, those irregularities were entirely normalized (Faraut et al 2015b).

In another study, volunteers coping with a 2-hour nightly regimen experienced heightened pain sensitivity — a common symptom of sleep deprivation. But once again, the effect was reversed after just two 30-minute naps (Faraut et al 2015a). 

2. Don’t assume that it’s pointless to lie down if you don’t fall asleep. You might pass into a state of drowsy, semi-conscious sleep — and reap some benefits.

Too wired to “sleep when the baby sleeps”? If so, keep in mind that quiet resting is better than nothing. In fact, if you are lying down with your eyes closed, you might be asleep without realizing it.

In numerous lab studies, subjects who were awakened from the first stage of sleep often denied that they were asleep at all (Dement and Vaughan 1999). A nap that consists only of stage 1 sleep might not help you improve your reaction times, but it will probably make you feel less tired. And if you manage to slip into the second stage of sleep — even for just 3 minutes — your nap may have recuperative effects (Hayashi et al 2005).

3. Don’t play the blame game. Brooding about the situation will make it harder for you to fall asleep when you are given the opportunity. And it’s wrong-headed, too: You might be doing everything you can to get more sleep, and still be stuck with a baby who sleeps less than average.

Research suggests that the amount of sleep we get at night is strongly influenced by genetics (Touchette et al 2013), and, as mentioned above, there is a lot of individual variation among newborns.

4. Don’t assume that breastfeeding will make you more sleepless than formula feeding. One study reported that the parents of breastfed babies averaged 40-45 minutes more sleep time than did the parents of formula-fed babies (Doan et al 2007).

5. If you are breastfeeding, you are likely to get more sleep if you keep your baby nearby. The World Health Organization recommends that babies share a bedroom with their parents, and it’s a recommendation that makes breastfeeding less disruptive. A recent study found that breastfeeding women got more sleep when they co-slept, same room, with baby (Quillin and Glenn 2004). In fact, mothers who co-slept, same room, and breastfed got more sleep than did mothers who bottle-fed their babies (Quillin and Glenn 2004).

6. If your baby is asleep, don’t worry about changing diapers. If your baby can’t sleep because they need a diaper change, they’ll let you know. And a little urine is unlikely to awaken them anyway. In a recent experiment, researchers injected water into the diapers of sleeping infants to see if this would wake them up (Zotter et al 2007). It didn’t.

7. Get sunlight and avoid artificial lighting at night. Make sure you expose yourself and your baby to bright light during the day. And keep lights out–or at least dimmed–after sunset.

As noted above, natural lighting helps influence newborn sleep patterns. But it also helps you keep your own circadian rhythms from drifting, which is important if you are going avoid insomnia and be a source of daytime cues for your newborn. 

8. Let a friend or family member watch your baby while you take a nap, even if this means your breastfed baby will take some meals from a bottle. Lactation experts often discourage breastfeeding mothers from bottle feeding babies for the first 3-4 weeks. The worry is that supplemental feeds will lead to a decreased milk supply and endanger successful breastfeeding in the long-term.

But you need to balance this against the negative effects of severe sleep restriction. Lack of sleep puts parents at increased risk of illness and postpartum depression, which is bad for parents and babies. If you are at the end of your rope, get help.

9. Trust your instincts, and get help when you feel stressed If something feels wrong with you or the baby, talk to your physician. And remember that your own mental health is crucial.

Coping with sleep deprivation is very stressful, especially if your infant  seems to be especially fussy or prone to crying. Watch for signs of  postpartum stress and  postpartum depression, and reach out to others for support.

10. Remember that things will get better Newborns have special sleep patterns and special needs. But things will start to get better around 12 weeks postpartum.


More reading relevant to newborn sleep

For more information about babies and sleep, see these fully-referenced Parenting Science articles.


References: What scientific studies say about newborn sleep

Sleep cycles and settling

Nurturing the Nurturer postpartum doula insights

One of the most challenging situations for families when adjusting to a new baby is the disruption of sleep and knowing how to manage it. My aim is to support you through this challenging time. I believe there are 6 key factors to establishing a positive, manageable and developmentally appropriate sleep routine for your baby;

  • A positive Sleep Environment
  • An age appropriate feed, play, sleep routine
  • Recognising tired signs
  • Age specific awake times
  • Engaging active play
  • Consistency

The aim of this is to educate, guide and support parents towards their goals with their children and to create a positive environment for parents and children. Parenting can be one of the most challenging but also one of the most rewarding experiences in your life. Through education, support and guidance I aim to build on your confidence with your parenting journey.

Sleep Benefits of Sleep • Sleep is beneficial for both brain development and growth. • Mental and physical health are dependent on sleep • Our muscles need sleep to relax, rest and repair • The immune system needs sleep to develop – this means that there is a decreased risk of infection with adequate sleep. • Basically, everything is better with more sleep.

Sleep and Settling The aim of settling your baby and using a progressive waiting responsive settling method is to teach the baby to become an independent sleeper. It is to build trust and good communication between the caretakers you, and the baby. We all need to learn the language of the baby- the difference between a cry (distressed) and a grizzle (communicating) and how to respond to both. Together we will be able to introduce different settling techniques that will comfort your baby enough for them to be able to put themselves to sleep. The aim is to have a relaxed baby who feels good about sleeping independently. This encourages long-term good sleeping patterns. Sleep deprivation has been used as a form of torture. Remember that you’re giving the baby the gift of sleep- and imagine how it must feel to be tired all the time (maybe this part isn’t so hard to imagine). Sleep deprivation is unhealthy for not only babies, but also mothers, fathers and for overall family relationships.

4 different types of cries Neh – hunger. Eh – upper wind (burp) Eairh – lower wind (gas) Heh – discomfort (hot, cold, wet) Owh – sleepiness.

Sleep Cycles

Play these sounds on the internet, it will not take long to recognise your baby’s different cries even though it seems like they are all the same at the moment. There are quite periods and active periods during sleep. These are known as sleep cycles. Some children call out when they wake (between cycles) and need assistance to settle again. The aim is to teach your baby to link these cycles independently.

Average sleep cycle Birth – 8 months 20 – 30 minutes 1 – 6 months 30 – 40 minutes 6 – 12 months 40 – 60 minutes Adults 90 minutes

Babies will sleep better if they are not over tired but also need to have stimulation during their awake time to be ready for sleep. Therefore, it is important to know the ideal timeframe for a babies age but also to know their tired signs

Tired Signs younger babies * Changes in facial expression * Jerky movements * Clenched fists * Fixed Stare * Grimacing * Sucking * Crying * Rigid limbs * Frowning * Grizzling * Hiccups * Back arching

Older babies  * Signs of disinterest or boredom * Decreased concentration * Temper tantrums * Rubbing eyes * Red eyes * Loss of balance  * Red eyebrows * Crying / squealing * Yawning Always be guided by your baby’s cues and put him or her to bed. Try not to exceed awake times and avoid putting the baby to bed too early. Give them appropriate awake time, and also follow their cues

Feeding • Feeding should be separated from sleeping- so that the feeding does not become an unsustainable sleep association • Feed the baby as soon as they wake up from their day sleep or within 15 minutes of waking • Allow them 45 minutes to finish feeding (milk; either breast or bottle). Babies who are on solids, offer them half an hour after they have finished their milk feed (except for dinner where it is the other way around). For older babies allow 1 hour between their milk feeds and solids. • At 10 months, solids should be given first, instead of milk, at all feed times

The importance of the catnap The catnap helps to eliminate overnight-unsettled periods/waking periods for babies. It assists in eliminating over-tiredness and irritability in older babies. It is usually the most difficult, but also the most important sleep of the day as it sets babies up for a good night sleep and gives baby a time of rest. The catnap is usually 45 minutes. As the baby gets older: The number of milk feeds decrease and the length of time between sleeps increases. Babies don’t usually drop sleeps as such, but their awake times extend and there is less time available for the additional sleeps

Sleep Associations As you may or may not know, there are many positive and negative sleep associations. A sleep association is simply something that comes right before or as the baby is going to sleep. These ‘positive’ sleep associations are things that you can easily do to prepare the baby for sleep. The baby will begin to learn to link these associations with sleep. This is a learnt behaviour; it is not innate. Perhaps you are using positive sleep associations already but are not aware that is what you are doing.

 Positive sleep associations • Wrapping the baby or using a Sleeping bag when appropriate • Using a Toy/Blanket in the cot • Making sure the Room temperature is consistent • Using a Dummy (if appropriate) • Utilising Relaxation music • winding down the baby (reading a story, singing a song to the baby before going to bed) • dark room

Problematic sleep associations are things that may help you put the baby to sleep, but they are not sustainable. Long term, these associations are not beneficial to you or the baby.

Negative or problematic sleep associations • Feeding to sleep, only if it is a problem • Patting to sleep. Rocking in arms, sometimes we need to do this • Rocking in pram and falling asleep. Co-sleeping • Driving around in the car to get or keep the baby asleep Together our aim is to teach baby to settle and re-settle themselves to sleep. Not for the baby to teach us how to settle them and re-settle them to sleep

Consistency Do not underestimate the importance of being consistent. This gives both you and your baby predictability and a positive guide to the day, and expectations of each other. All adults involved in your baby’s care need to be on the same page, parents, grandparents, nanny’s, childcare etc. when we as adults present differing information from the other carers (or even if WE change what we are doing), our baby/child becomes confused and do not understand what is expected of them. This is where positive sleep associations are good for different settings, the baby/child knows it is sleep time when these happen wherever they are. Be positive – babies feed off our emotions if we are not confident then our babies will not be confident. • Often babies will improve overnight first, the days may remain challenging

Play Play is a very important part of your baby’s life. It is fantastic for the parent-infant interaction. Omit too much stimulation overnight – quiet play/activity – massage, book reading, ‘night time equals quiet time’ Give your baby more time on the floor during their awake times- it facilitates gross motor development and exercise. For young babies 5-10 minutes of tummy/mat time will be enough to burn energy and make them tire • Be sure to give your baby kicking and nappy off time • Walk in the pram each day – going for a walk will make you both feel better • Cuddle, and sing to your baby during awake time  • Make sure that you don’t spend babies entire awake time in the pram, the car, and highchair- give them stimulation • Playtime occurs after feeding during the day only

A final word  • Be confident and committed to your decision – you are giving the gift of sleep • All babies learn at different times and different stage (just like adults), be parietal and consistent • Most baby’s night time sleep will improve before their days, but stick at it as the days and nights are linked. As the nights continue to improve so will the days *Although a feed, play, sleep routine can be implemented with a newborn, I wouldn’t recommend trying to establish a strict routine with this age group. Newborns require frequent feeds and are better suited to a demand feed routine

Postpartum month

This postpartum period is traditionally a time when new mothers are cared for and supported by relatives and friends at home. This practice allows the new mother to recuperate from pregnancy and birth, while getting to know and bonding with her baby, beginning her role as a mother feeling supported and confident. Sounds like bliss, doesn’t it? In today’s hectic and rushed Western culture, the idea of having time to care for yourself and your baby for a month after birth sounds intoxicating, but unrealistic. We’re expected to give birth and then jump back into life, without regard to how intense and demanding life with a newborn is. Our society focuses only on the baby after birth, not the mother.

Why Is a Post-Natal Month A Good Idea? The first days following the birth of your baby are usually a blur. The demands of pregnancy and labour take hold – you’re exhausted and on a hormonal rollercoaster. Paired with this the raw knowledge you’re now the centre of a tiny vulnerable human’s world, it’s no wonder many women feel completely overwhelmed by their new status as mother. The World Health Organization describes the postpartum period as the most critical phase in the lives of mothers and babies, yet it’s the most neglected. In today’s busy world, women are expected to be on their feet within days of giving birth.

In countries such as Australia, the United States and Britain, maternity and paternity leave allowances may not support women or their partners from taking much time away from paid employment. Some women don’t have relatives close by to help and others have plenty of people but few offers of help. And then there’s the expectation that we should be coping, that the baby is the icing on the cake and how we as new mothers feel doesn’t really matter. With post-natal depression rates on the rise and new parents burning out with exhaustion, a post-natal month has never been more important. We spend so much time focused on our pregnancy and the birth, very little energy is directed towards what happens when the baby arrives, when the dynamic of your life will shift away from you and onto the baby

Prepare For A Post-Natal Month During pregnancy, there’s a huge focus on getting prepared for birth and for what the baby will need. The idea being that you will have a healthy baby and life goes on happily afterwards. The reality is rarely that simple. Many new mamas barely sleep more than a few hours at a time, yet are expected to function normally, to keep things running smoothly for everyone else. You may need a c-section which means extra time recovering physically. Dealing with these massive upheavals to the life you have so far been leading can be very challenging – you might know in theory that things will change but it’s very different to be living that experience. The shift to focus on your additional role as a mother needs to take place well before the baby is born. Explore the possibilities of your partner taking as much time off work as possible. Not only does this provide plenty of bonding opportunities for them, you can both share the responsibilities of caring for your baby together. This is an excellent way to begin your new journey as a family together. Enlist the support of your nearest and dearest. If you’re having a baby shower, ask your friends and relatives for the gift of their time and support. They could organise a roster of meals delivered each day, a freezer filled with prepared snacks and dinners, and even help with housework and laundry. A postpartum doula or a cleaner can also help provide you with more time to rest and recuperate.

You Don’t Have To Do It Alone One of the messed up attitudes our society applies to mothers is asking for help is a sign of ‘not coping’. The pressure is on a new mother to keep the household going, get meals and entertain visitors/other children, even though she is in pain, exhausted, or struggling with early breastfeeding. If you have relatives or friends that offer help, take them up on it. If you’re in the position to accept live-in help, make the most of that support! Most likely your family and friends really want to feel useful to you. Explain to those who’ve offered to help exactly what you need from them. Many women often don’t like to ask for what they really need in case they appear demanding or rude. During the post-natal period, women tend to be so focused on their baby and getting back on their feet, it is easy to forget about their own needs. Asking for help can feel like a sign of weakness – when it should be seen as honouring the huge physical and emotional demand birth and new motherhood has placed on you. Putting your needs higher on the priority lists helps you to care for your baby and adjust to your new role.

Nesting Isn’t Just For Pregnancy You’ve just spent nine months growing and nourishing a baby. You probably experienced the phenomenon known as ‘nesting’ at some point during your pregnancy – a compulsion to get ready for your baby’s arrival which could keep you scrubbing shower screens long past the time others would’ve quit. That nesting instinct should be encouraged beyond birth. Creating a space to snuggle and bond with your baby provides you both with the opportunity to get to know each other. Bonding is a physical and emotional experience. Babies want to be close to their mothers, for security, warmth and nourishment. Mothers want to be close to their babies, being primed by the love hormone oxytocin, to care and nurture their child. This closeness enhances your ability to tune into your baby. Mother’s intuition isn’t something that happens the moment your baby is born. It builds up and is something you learn with your baby. You’re forming a relationship – take the time to really get to know one another. The confidence to trust your intuition will pay off as your child grows and develops.

You Don’t Have To Be A Super Woman Your body returning to a non-pregnant state isn’t as simple as losing your belly. There are many physical and hormonal changes taking place as your uterus shrinks and lactation begins. You might be recovering from an instrumental birth or a c-section. The reality is even a straightforward birth can leave you feeling sore and uncomfortable. Rest and recuperation is a necessity for healing after labour or a c-section – you risk creating more problems for yourself later if you overdo things. Many women who experience things like constipation, separated abdominal muscles, organ prolapse and stitches would greatly benefit from allowing their body the rest it needs. Doing too much physically can make those issues worse or create further problems. Today’s society has many expectations of women and we are constantly under pressure to meet these ideals of who we should be, how we should act and the ideals we should meet. We’re rarely afforded the ability to focus on our transformation into motherhood and this can have a far-reaching impact on our own mental health, the way we interact with our children and family. If a full month is impossible, even a few weeks is a great start. The idea is to keep your feet off the floor as much as possible. Spend time baby gazing, dozing in the quiet hours of feeding, reading that book you’ve been meaning to or catching up on a favourite TV series. You can’t put off healing until ‘later’ as that time will never come.

A guide to happy newborns

 The Nest Your body is where your newborn has called home up until now. Creating a sacred, womb-like container dedicated to nurturing and bonding, is a wonderful way to ease your newborn’s transition from the womb into life in the outside world. Whether your nest is your bedroom or your entire house, create a sacred space with these elements for your 6-week postpartum window Extra warmth – Use a space heater to warm up the nest somewhere between 19-22 degrees Celsius .Diffused light– Sheer curtains for daytime resting, dark room for evening. Extra blankets and pillows– Extra comfort for mama and baby during snuggle time Calming music – Meditative music such as nature sounds or white noise with music incorporated helps create a restful, healing mood. Wheat bag – Heat up until warm (not hot) place on bed until warm then remove. Bed is warm for you and baby to lie on. Essential oil diffuser – Add healing aromas to the air. Lavender for deep relaxation and thieves blend to protect against germs. Hold off on incense until the baby is a little older. Avoid synthetic air fresheners.

 Tips for Baby’s Best Rest & Rhythm 1. Don’t tiptoe around your baby during the day. There is no need to whisper. Talk normally and allow your older children to play. As your baby awakens more into this world, they will become more alert during the day and sleep deeper at night. This encourages a healthy sleep pattern essential for your mental well-being! 2. Swaddle your baby. Since baby has been curled up in your womb for 9 months, they are used to being in a warm, secure, confined space. Swaddling will help them rest deeper Developing a daily rhythm for eating, sleeping, massage, baths and quiet time will benefit both you and your baby immensely. *Adding structure to daily life, allows for greater stability and deeper rest. *Limit visiting time to avoid disruption of daily rhythms and rest. This is especially true in the first 3 weeks. Too many visitors could disrupt the deep rejuvenation and bonding necessary during this sacred time, as well as accidentally introduce germs and sickness into your nest. *Stay indoors for the first few weeks. Both you and your baby’s immune system and energies are highly sensitive at this time. If you really need to go outside to get some fresh air, leave the baby inside if at all possible.

Baby’s Bellies There are many elements at play that can effect a baby’s digestion. Some babies are blessed with happy and resilient baby bellies, while others are stricken with terrible colic. No mother or father wants to bear witness to the unrelenting screams of their colicky baby. What have we been taught to prevent it? Eliminating things like broccoli, cabbage and chilies from your postpartum diet is unlikely to be enough. Lucky for us, we can draw on practical Ayurvedic baby care wisdom to guide our way to happy baby bellies.

 Breast Milk High quality breast milk is nectar for your baby. It ensures a healthy immune system, digestive system, as well as delivers perfect custom nourishment to their entire body High quality breast-milk is easily digestible, promotes growth and development and of course happy baby bellies. Not all breast milk is created equal. If you are eating difficult to digest foods such as red meat, aged cheeses, frozen casseroles or leftovers, I would bet your breast-milk is also difficult to digest. Such milk puts added strain on baby’s still developing digestive system, which can develop into upset baby bellies and colic .Good baby care involves mama eating a postpartum diet focused on easy to digest, well-spiced, nourishing foods is a key factor in your baby’s digestive health.

 Formula It is best, if at all possible to breastfeed your baby. If this is not an option, an organic, non-homogenized (cream top) cow or goat milk formula should be used. Avoid the use of soy formulas. High levels of estrogen are found in soy, which can be problematic for the health of your developing child. To aid digestibility, first bring water to a boil and cool to body temperature. This simplifies the milk protein molecule for your baby’s sensitive system.  Always serve formula warm or even room temperature, never cold  . Baby will enjoy it more and be less likely to have digestive and other health imbalances

 Feeding Tips Nurse on demand for the first 2 weeks. After that, allow at least 2 hours between feedings to allow ample time for digestion. Hold your baby at an angle when nursing. Having their head above their feet will help gravity move the milk down through their digestive tract. Burp your baby after feeding. This may seem obvious, but I have come across new mothers who didn’t know to do it with their baby. This helps ingested air bubbles work their way back out quickly. Otherwise, poor baby has to work them through their sensitive digestive system. Not fun!

 Healthy Elimination Healthy elimination begins with at least 3 wet diapers a day (before your milk comes in) and 6 wet diapers a day thereafter. After a couple of days, the baby should be done passing meconium, and at least 3 poopy diapers a day is expected. Your baby’s first few poops will be a dark tarry substance called meconium. It is best to use disposable diapers the first few days, because meconium is very sticky and hard to wash out. Next, it will transform into a lighter yellow green colour that is less sticky. This in turn will transition into a yellow, creamy poop that can be runny. It will stay this consistency until you introduce solids. If after 5 days, your baby’s poop is red, white, grey, like tar, very watery or hard, contact your birth professional. Although western baby care experts believe constipation in breastfed babies isn’t a serious concern, your baby is likely to be uncomfortable if they don’t eliminate every day.  If this seems to be a regular occurrence, it is likely that you will need to assess and adjust your diet as well.

Managing Upset Bellies & Colic If your baby cries and pulls their legs tight to their belly, twists or arches their back, they may be experiencing discomfort in their belly, usually from gas. There can be many contributing factors to this including your diet, formula, complications from the birth, presence while nursing, and even emotional upset.

 Postpartum Diet The most important aspect of a good postpartum diet is rekindling a strong digestive fire. Without digestive strength, virtually anything you eat will move through your system partially unprocessed. This will lead to heavy, hard to digest breast-milk and eventually to upset baby bellies and colic. It is important to eat warm, soupy, easy to digest foods. Adding plenty of digestive spices to your meals and teas also is important to aid your digestive strength.

 Baby Massage Daily warm oil massage enhances your baby’s immune strength and T-cell production, helps prevent/reverse colic, promotes healthy elimination, as well as promoting deep sleep and weight gain. Giving your baby oil massage every day helps promote bonding, and is an excellent opportunity for the father and siblings to connect more deeply with the baby and provide some essential baby care Daily baby massage with warm sesame oil is one of the best ways to remedy upset bellies and colic. Warm sesame oil is very grounding and soothing to your baby’s sensitive system. It can help prevent digestive and emotional problems, as well as reverse colic and constipation. For a quick fix: massage baby’s belly with gentle clockwise circles, circling from the bellybutton outward to the descending colon. Do this 9X and apply a warm washcloth to the belly for a few minutes. Make sure the room is extra warm!

 Baby Exercises Baby exercises help expel gas from your baby’s belly, offering them much welcomed relief. For a quick fix: Loosen baby’s diaper and bring their knees together. With gentle firmness push their knees up to their belly and hold there (don’t let their knees separate from each other). At this point you might notice them trying to release gas or stool. Give them encouragement to do so. After 10-15 seconds release and repeat until baby feels more comfortable.

Bath A nice warm bath is the perfect ending to this essential baby care routine. Avoid using harsh chemicals and soaps on baby’s skin. Use a mild unscented glycerine soap or better yet, an Ayurvedic pudding soap made with milk and garbanzo bean flour.

After baby has arrived, you will have your hands full, no doubt! Being prepared with the essential elements needed to ensure both you and your baby’s wellbeing will empower you to have the postpartum experience of your dreams. Rest in bliss with your angel.   It is in fact, your birthright

Go back to sleep trick

Nurturing the Nurturer postpartum doula insights

Here is a sleep tip for you…. what was your pre-pregnancy sleep requirement? 8 hours? 9 hours? Whatever that ideal sleep quota was, make that your sleep goal now. You may need to adjust that time to get a bit more sleep during this time of healing, but your pre-pregnancy sleep quota is a great place to start. As you wake to feed your baby during the night, keep track of how many total hours you have slept so far. Keep going back to bed in the morning, until you have reached that sleep goal. It may take until noon before you get enough sleep, but that’s OK! Once you have reached your sleep goal for the night, shower and get ready for your day. If you have other children who need care in the early morning hours, this is a great time to hire a sitter or ask grandma to come and hang out with the kid’s while you get more sleep.

What to expect after a C-Section

by Sam McCulloch Dip CBEdLast updated February 17, 2021 Reading Time: 12 minafter c section

Having a c-section can be a daunting and stressful experience, especially if a medical complication occurred during labour and your c-section was unplanned. You might feel unprepared for what’s to come afterwards.

Even if you were prepared for your c-section, you might be concerned about the recovery period and what to expect in the days and weeks that follow.

Having as much information as possible about what to expect following a c-section can empower you to have a more positive and less stressful recovery period.

Knowing what to expect can help you prepare for recovery and make sure you have adequate support in place.

What To Expect After A C-Section

Here’s what to expect after your c-section:

Immediately After Surgery

Straight after a c-section, you will need to spend some time in recovery. You’ll need to be monitored to ensure your vital signs are stabilised and you are not having adverse reactions to medication.

Staff will monitor any bleeding from your incision site as well as vaginal bleeding. Your blood pressure and temperature will also be monitored. Your IV will remain in place to provide fluids and pain medication.

The catheter, collecting urine and emptying your bladder, will also remain, usually until the next day. You’ll be encouraged to get up to walk to the bathroom, which is an important part of recovery.

When you’re ready you will be moved to your room. You’ll still have no feeling in the lower part of your body and could be feeling a bit woozy and shaky. If your baby is with you, ask for help to hold him, skin to skin, above your incision site. It’s okay to breastfeed if your baby is interested. While you are waiting for the anaesthetic to wear off, spend the time snuggling up and getting to know your baby.

You might experience very itchy skin in the first few hours after the surgery. This is a side effect of a narcotic that might have been used during the c-section. The itchiness will lessen as the drug leaves your system.

Some women have a reaction to the anaesthetic, and develop severe shakes during surgery and afterwards. The spinal block, or epidural, dilates your skin’s blood vessels and you lose a lot of body heat. The shaking will disappear as the drug wears off, but the recovery nurse or midwife can provide you with extra blankets if needed.

Your blood pressure could drop as a result of the epidural and, especially if you had a general anaesthetic, you might feel nauseous upon recovery; again, these are reactions to the drugs used and the symptoms will fade very soon.

An annoying side effect of c-section surgery that might occur is shoulder pain. This is a sharp pain beneath one or both of your shoulder blades. It’s due to air entering your abdominal cavity during the surgery. The air pocket will be gradually absorbed by your body over the next few days, and the pain will disappear.

Very rarely, women experience severe headaches, and swelling at the site of injection into the spine. If this happens, it’s important to tell your care provider immediately so relief methods can be discussed.

Pain Relief After a C-Section

Some women need effective pain relief after experiencing a c-section; others are up and about within a few days and feel little pain. This could be due to individual differences in pain tolerance, or what happened before or during the c-section. How you feel about your experience can also contribute to the level of pain you might have afterwards.

There are several medications, taken individually or in combination, which will offer pain relief after your c-section. Your midwife or anaesthetist will recommend which drugs will best help you to cope. If you continue to experience pain, then you should alert your midwife to your condition, so that she can help alleviate your distress.

Please remember that it can be better to ‘stay on top’ of the pain, as some of the drugs work best when they reach a certain level. If you force yourself to cope with pain to the point where you desperately need pain relief, then you might not get the full benefit of the medication. Some types of pain relief are:

  • Narcotic medication: specifically, pethidine and morphine. These can be given by injection into your leg muscle every 3-4 hours. If you have an IV in place you might receive a ‘fixed dose infusion’ via a Patient-Controlled Analgesia Pump, which enables you to self-medicate as needed (you will be instructed how to use this pump). If you had an epidural and the catheter is still in place after the surgery, you might receive small doses through this. Another way of receiving this medication is via a single spinal injection.
  • Suppository: contains an anti-inflammatory drug to help you cope with pain while it reduces any abdominal inflammation you might be experiencing. This drug is inserted into your rectum, and is quickly absorbed. It’s usually given twice a day.
  • Narcotics: These might be codeine, morphine or pethidine. If possible, it’s better to use these drugs in moderation as they can cause constipation, which is not a pleasant experience after a c-section. If they are used, make sure you drink plenty of fluids, and keep mobile. Some doctors or nurses might recommend a stool softener be taken with narcotics.
  • Paracetamol: This might be offered alone, if you’re coping well with pain, or in combination with the above narcotics, to reduce the amount of drugs needed.

It’s important to know you have the right to be informed about the possible side effects of any drugs used to help manage pain after your c-section. If you have any concerns about how these drugs might affect you or your baby (especially if you are breastfeeding), you should discuss your worries with your care provider.

Over time you will be given lower doses of pain medication to see how your body is coping. Your midwife or doctor should guide you towards a gradual reduction in pain relief during the time leading up to your discharge.

Drinking and Eating After a C-Section

It’s wise to start with fluids and clear foods, and possibly even solid foods, quite soon after your surgery. Your midwife/doctor will advise you about any restrictions in your individual case, and the reasons for them. Each hospital will have guidelines related to this, so you need to check if it’s okay before eating or drinking anything.

Generally, if you had an epidural or spinal block, then your fluid intake will not be restricted. You may drink any fluids – such as water, juice and cordial – and eat such clear foods as soups and jellies. But you mustn’t start eating solid foods until you’ve passed wind – this is a sign that your intestines (which will have been ‘relaxed’ during your surgery) are beginning to function normally again. At this stage in your recovery a light diet is best, until your intestines become better able to handle your food intake.

Once you’ve had a bowel motion, then you can eat whatever you like. It’s really important to keep up your fluid intake, especially if you’re breastfeeding, so always be sure to have a glass of water close at hand while feeding your baby.

It’s recommended that you try really hard to drink at least 8 glasses of water a day. This will prevent dehydration, and help make up for any blood loss you experienced; it will also keep your bladder functioning well and help prevent constipation.

Urinating After a C-Section

When your urinary catheter is removed you might be asked to measure the amount of urine you pass on the first day without it. You will be supplied with a special measuring container in which to urinate, so don’t forget to hold on to your urine until the midwife has noted the amount.

If you’re having difficulties urinating, then you might like to try some ways of triggering the urge – such as turning on a tap, hopping in a warm shower, or pouring an amount of warm water over the area. If the difficulty persists, then the catheter might need to be reinserted.https://b03c19be32d103695a2f1d44ef510a07.safeframe.googlesyndication.com/safeframe/1-0-38/html/container.html

Some of the drugs given to you during the surgery, or for pain relief afterwards, might affect your bladder function. It would be worthwhile investigating this as a possible cause of any problems you might encounter regaining normal bladder function.

Some women experience physical trauma related to the urinary catheter. If you feel any burning pain upon urinating, especially if it persists, you need to let your doctor or midwife know about the problem.

To help prevent any bladder problems, try to urinate at least every couple of hours during the first day or so. This will prevent the pain caused by a full bladder putting pressure on your c-section incision.

If you experience incontinence (leaking urine) seek advice from the midwife or women’s physiotherapist. Ask about exercises that you can perform to increase your ability to maintain bladder control (pelvic floor exercises, etc). It’s common during pregnancy to experience some incontinence, as a result of your growing pregnant belly applying pressure to your bladder, and/or the normal relaxing hormonal effects of pregnancy itself. Having a c-section doesn’t mean you won’t experience a weakening of your pelvic floor muscles, and it’s important to address any issues early on.

Another problem sometimes experienced, is the lack of that sensation that tells you your bladder is full and you need to urinate. This is also something that should be brought to the attention of your doctor or midwife.

Bowel Movements After a C-Section

Within the first couple of days after your c-section, you should feel the need to move your bowels. This can be a scary experience in itself, as you’ll feel unsure as to how much pushing your wound can withstand. It can be reassuring to apply gentle pressure, with the palm of your hand, over the wound area. Avoid straining while having a bowel movement; this has the potential to cause haemorrhoids or possibly prolapse.

Avoiding constipation is important, as the added pain and discomfort can be very distressing. Drink plenty of water, eat a fibre-rich diet and, if possible, limit the amount of narcotics you take for pain relief. If you continue to have problems with constipation your midwife might suggest you use a stool softener.

Vaginal Blood Loss After A C-Section

Your midwife will ask to view your sanitary pads over the first few days after your c-section, to check the amount and colour of vaginal blood loss.

The flow might increase when you breastfeed your baby, as breastfeeding hormones encourage uterine contractions. When you stand up, your flow might suddenly increase as well, as a result of gravity. You might also pass some clots, although they shouldn’t be too big. If you’re concerned about anything to do with the amount, or consistency, of your blood loss, then ask your midwife to check your discharge for you.

At first, your blood loss will be bright red, and slightly heavier than a normal period – although it shouldn’t exceed one sanitary pad per 4 hours (if it does exceed this, then advise your midwife). The loss will decrease over the next week, and the colour will alter to a paler red, then a brownish-red colour. The flow should stop after a week or so, although light blood loss can last for about 6 weeks after the birth and isn’t a cause for concern. It differs for each woman. If you are worried, contact your midwife or doctor for advice.

Caring For Your Wound After A C-Section

You might have received antibiotics while still in theatre, and the surgeon will have placed a sterile dressing to cover the incision site.  These safeguards will help reduce the likelihood of infection.

The day after your c-section you’ll be encouraged to get up and have a shower. This is usually when the sterile dressing is removed. You should gently wash away any dried blood from around your wound; use water only, as soap might irritate. Dry the area by patting it with a towel. If it’s possible, allowing the wound area to air-dry is best.

Before you are discharged from hospital the doctor will remove any staples used, and will cover the incision with sterile strips, which are similar to bandaids. In some cases, however, staples might remain until a postpartum follow up. You’ll be instructed on how to keep your wound clean and undisturbed. You might find it uncomfortable if clothes rub directly onto your wound; your maternity clothes might be the best option for the first few weeks. Big underwear rather than bikini briefs are a good option, as the waistband will be higher than the wound area.https://b03c19be32d103695a2f1d44ef510a07.safeframe.googlesyndication.com/safeframe/1-0-38/html/container.html

Your wound might continue to feel uncomfortable for some time after the surgery. During certain activities, some women experience mild pain and pulling sensations for several months afterwards.  In the majority of women, this goes away after a time. If you’re worried about these sensations, discuss them with your midwife or doctor.

If you notice any swelling or redness, or if your wound weeps blood or other fluids, please bring this to the notice of your midwife or doctor as soon as possible – especially if the symptoms are associated with pain or fever.

Finding Time to Rest After Your C-Section

It usually takes longer to recover from a c-section than from a vaginal birth, and it’s important to take care of yourself through the postpartum period (the six weeks after birth). There’s no putting off healing until ‘later’, and rest is a big part of the healing process. Eat well, have plenty of support in place, and try to get some sleep while your baby is sleeping.

Even if your c-section was planned, it’s not uncommon for women to feel very tired after the surgery. If your c-section was unplanned, you might also be dealing with emotional shock. You might find in the first few days that you want to limit visitors to immediately family only, so you can rest and recuperate. After a c-section, some women find it difficult, or even embarrassing, trying to get mobile again when there are lots of visitors present.

Don’t hesitate to ask for support from the staff, family and friends, especially in those first few days of caring for your brand new baby.

Tips to help you get some rest:

  • A ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign is great – both in hospital and at home. During your pregnancy you can make your own personalised one, with an explanation that Mum and Baby are having a nap. Take the phone off the hook and catch up on sleep!
  • In hospital you can ask your partner to remind visitors not to stay too long. It can be exhausting if you’re entertaining when you should be resting. The same applies at home, for those first few weeks of recovery.
  • Keep your baby close by during the night, not in another room – at least for the first few weeks. If you keep your baby’s cot near your bed, you won’t have far to go to attend to your baby’s needs.
  • If your baby’s presence keeps you awake (those little sniffling noises can be daunting to a new mum) then organise some time during which your partner, or someone else you trust, can care for your baby while you have a nap all by yourself.

What About Sex After A C-Section?

Whether you have had a vaginal or c-section birth, the same rule applies: have sex when you feel ready. Many providers recommend waiting until vaginal bleeding has ceased, to avoid infection, while others recommend waiting until your 6-week postnatal follow-up.

Before you do, try to organise what contraceptive you will use; it’s wise to allow your body time to physically heal from your c-section before becoming pregnant again.https://b03c19be32d103695a2f1d44ef510a07.safeframe.googlesyndication.com/safeframe/1-0-38/html/container.html

You might need to try a few different positions during sex if you’re still feeling some pain or want to avoid pressure on the wound area. Discuss with your partner the possibility that you might need to stop during sex if this is a problem.

The wound, and the area surrounding it, can remain numb for months (or up to a year) after the surgery. This is due to nerve stretching, or damage, resulting from the incision, and surgical trauma to the area. Feeling should eventually return. It might be a good idea to explain this numbness to your partner, as it can be disturbing to be touched on this numb area.

If you’re breastfeeding, the lowered estrogen levels can reduce the vaginal secretions that are normally present during sexual activity. If this is the case, you might need to purchase a water-based lubricant gel to replace your natural secretions, to enable sex to be more enjoyable.

You might not even feel like having sex. This can become quite a challenge for couples, especially if partners do not understand why you aren’t interested. Give your partner this article to read, for insight on the reasons why women aren’t interested in sex after birth.

Women who have given birth via c-section can still experience painful intercourse and other sexual problems. Your doctor or midwife can help if you run into trouble.

What to Expect Emotionally After A C-Section

The emotions that you might experience after a c-section will depend very much on whether you chose to birth in this way, or whether you had been aiming for a natural, uncomplicated vaginal birth. Your emotions will also be affected by what actually occurred during the c-section birth of your baby.

If you prepared yourself for a c-section, and everything went well on the day, then you might have no emotional issues connected with the c-section at all. You might flow straight back into everyday life with very little difficulty, apart from the normal, and necessary, physical healing.

If you planned a c-section birth, but if  on the day, something ‘happened’  that wasn’t expected (e.g. your child needed paediatric help, or your anaesthesia didn’t work as well as expected, etc) then you might need to deal with the emotional trauma that is connected to these experiences.

You might also have wanted a natural birth and, in late pregnancy or on the day, events did not go as planned, so an emergency c-section became necessary. An unplanned c-section can be a traumatic experience for some women.

The degree of emotional trauma associated with each of these situations usually relates to the ‘why’ of the c-section, how much control you had over the birth experience, and the progress and outcome of the surgery.

You might find some relief by talking about your feelings – to your partner, family, friends, or the midwives and the doctors who were involved in your care. It might help to have more information about the ‘why’, so you can process some of the strong emotions attached to your memories.

If you were planning a vaginal birth, it’s normal to experience some grief at the loss of such an integral life experience. We envision how our children’s births will unfold on the day, and when things don’t go as planned, we can sometimes feel grief at the loss of this important milestone.

These feelings might not arise immediately following the birth of your child. It can take time before you experience any sense of grief or loss over your planned birth. Often women are told to feel grateful for the medical help they received. While there is no denying you are grateful, it’s important to acknowledge your feelings and avoid letting them become overwhelming. A healthy baby is important but, at the same time, it does matter how you feel about your birth.

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Postpartum month

This postpartum period is traditionally a time when new mothers are cared for and supported by relatives and friends at home.

This practice allows the new mother to recuperate from pregnancy and birth, while getting to know and bonding with her baby, beginning her role as a mother feeling supported and confident.

Sounds like bliss, doesn’t it?

In today’s hectic and rushed Western culture, the idea of having time to care for yourself and your baby for a month after birth sounds intoxicating, but unrealistic. We’re expected to give birth and then jump back into life, without regard to how intense and demanding life with a newborn is. Our society focuses only on the baby after birth, not the mother.

Why Is a Post-Natal Month A Good Idea?

The first days following the birth of your baby are usually a blur. The demands of pregnancy and labour take hold – you’re exhausted and on a hormonal rollercoaster. Paired with this the raw knowledge you’re now the centre of a tiny vulnerable human’s world, it’s no wonder many women feel completely overwhelmed by their new status as mother.

The World Health Organization describes the postpartum period as the most critical phase in the lives of mothers and babies, yet it’s the most neglected. In today’s busy world, women are expected to be on their feet within days of giving birth.

In countries such as Australia, the United States and Britain, maternity and paternity leave allowances may not support women or their partners from taking much time away from paid employment. Some women don’t have relatives close by to help and others have plenty of people but few offers of help. And then there’s the expectation that we should be coping, that the baby is the icing on the cake and how we as new mothers feel doesn’t really matter.

With post-natal depression rates on the rise and new parents burning out with exhaustion, a post-natal month has never been more important. We spend so much time focused on our pregnancy and the birth, very little energy is directed towards what happens when the baby arrives, when the dynamic of your life will shift away from you and onto the baby.

Prepare For A Post-Natal Month

During pregnancy, there’s a huge focus on getting prepared for birth and for what the baby will need. The idea being that you will have a healthy baby and life goes on happily afterwards.

The reality is rarely that simple. Many new mamas barely sleep more than a few hours at a time, yet are expected to function normally, to keep things running smoothly for everyone else. You may need a c-section which means extra time recovering physically. Dealing with these massive upheavals to the life you have so far been leading can be very challenging – you might know in theory that things will change but it’s very different to be living that experience.

The shift to focus on your additional role as a mother needs to take place well before the baby is born. Explore the possibilities of your partner taking as much time off work as possible. Not only does this provide plenty of bonding opportunities for them, you can both share the responsibilities of caring for your baby together. This is an excellent way to begin your new journey as a family together.

Enlist the support of your nearest and dearest. If you’re having a baby shower, ask your friends and relatives for the gift of their time and support. They could organise a roster of meals delivered each day, a freezer filled with prepared snacks and dinners, and even help with housework and laundry. A postpartum doula or a cleaner can also help provide you with more time to rest and recuperate.

You Don’t Have To Do It Alone

One of the messed up attitudes our society applies to mothers is asking for help is a sign of ‘not coping’. The pressure is on a new mother to keep the household going, get meals and entertain visitors/other children, even though she is in pain, exhausted, or struggling with early breastfeeding.

If you have relatives or friends that offer help, take them up on it. If you’re in the position to accept live-in help, make the most of that support! Most likely your family and friends really want to feel useful to you. Explain to those who’ve offered to help exactly what you need from them. Many women often don’t like to ask for what they really need in case they appear demanding or rude.

During the post-natal period, women tend to be so focused on their baby and getting back on their feet, it is easy to forget about their own needs. Asking for help can feel like a sign of weakness – when it should be seen as honouring the huge physical and emotional demand birth and new motherhood has placed on you.

Putting your needs higher on the priority lists helps you to care for your baby and adjust to your new role.

Nesting Isn’t Just For Pregnancy

You’ve just spent nine months growing and nourishing a baby. You probably experienced the phenomenon known as ‘nesting’ at some point during your pregnancy – a compulsion to get ready for your baby’s arrival which could keep you scrubbing shower screens long past the time others would’ve quit. That nesting instinct should be encouraged beyond birth.

Creating a space to snuggle and bond with your baby provides you both with the opportunity to get to know each other. Bonding is a physical and emotional experience. Babies want to be close to their mothers, for security, warmth and nourishment. Mothers want to be close to their babies, being primed by the love hormone oxytocin, to care and nurture their child. This closeness enhances your ability to tune into your baby.

Mother’s intuition isn’t something that happens the moment your baby is born. It builds up and is something you learn with your baby. You’re forming a relationship – take the time to really get to know one another. The confidence to trust your intuition will pay off as your child grows and develops.

You Don’t Have To Be A Super Woman

Your body returning to a non-pregnant state isn’t as simple as losing your belly. There are many physical and hormonal changes taking place as your uterus shrinks and lactation begins. You might be recovering from an instrumental birth or a c-section. The reality is even a straightforward birth can leave you feeling sore and uncomfortable.

Rest and recuperation is a necessity for healing after labour or a c-section – you risk creating more problems for yourself later if you overdo things. Many women who experience things like constipation, separated abdominal muscles, organ prolapse and stitches would greatly benefit from allowing their body the rest it needs. Doing too much physically can make those issues worse or create further problems.

Today’s society has many expectations of women and we are constantly under pressure to meet these ideals of who we should be, how we should act and the ideals we should meet. We’re rarely afforded the ability to focus on our transformation into motherhood and this can have a far-reaching impact on our own mental health, the way we interact with our children and family.

If a full month is impossible, even a few weeks is a great start. The idea is to keep your feet off the floor as much as possible. Spend time baby gazing, dozing in the quiet hours of feeding, reading that book you’ve been meaning to or catching up on a favourite TV series. You can’t put off healing until ‘later’ as that time will never come.